


I Don't Understand How to Apply That Reference

by PaperAnn



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Anal Sex, Awkward Castiel, Blow Jobs, Bottom Dean, Explicit Sexual Content, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Post-Episode: s10e05 Fan Fiction, Shipper Sam, Smut, Top Castiel, Wingman Hannah
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-21
Updated: 2015-01-24
Packaged: 2018-02-26 12:23:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 35,410
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2651936
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PaperAnn/pseuds/PaperAnn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Strange things have been happening all around the Winchesters.  However, it's a whole new brand of <i>strange.</i>  What's actually behind it... is Castiel, attempting to court Dean through his new knowledge of pop culture, alongside his wingman - Hannah.  Who clearly have no idea what the hell they're doing.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Star-Crossed Lovers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _The device in front of Hannah, though it took some explaining, was called a ‘laptop.’ It was even more foreign than the concept of love, but much more workable, in her opinion. This was a tool she could use, not something she had to understand._
> 
> _Since Metatron had filled Castiel’s brain with pop culture the angel had become obsessed. Since ‘Dean loves pop culture,’ and ‘I can finally understand his references’ it ‘must be the way to win him over.’_
> 
> _So here Hannah was, searching through this additional concept called ‘the internet,’ trying to figure out what love was, and what human-made fiction Castiel could incorporate into this idea of his. Half of what she found was sheer lunacy, but she kept that to herself as she clicked away. She couldn’t decipher what was relevant, and what wasn’t, so as Castiel flipped through a book (which was actually to help the brothers with a case) she decided to read a few of her findings out loud._
> 
> _“"After all... I'm just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her.""_
> 
> _“That doesn’t apply, my vessel is male. Notting Hill is a good example, though, you’re doing very well, Hannah.”_

The Winchester brothers jerked awake from their hotel beds as the blaring sounds of the radio roused them just shy of their four hours, to the sounds of, “ _And I-------I will always, loooove, youuuuuu!”_

“What the fuck!” Dean shouted, “Did you set the alarm?! I thought I told you, the phone alarm is _fine_ , not _this_ bullshit!”

“At least it’s not Asia,” Sam mumbled, and smacked the alarm until, after a few sad attempts, he finally shut it off.

“What?” Dean wiped the sleep from his eyes and after a blank stare and not getting an answer, stretched his limbs. “I call shower first.”

“Sure, sure, whatever.”

Sam watched his brother grab the duffle and march off to the bathroom as he felt a tingle go through his spine. It wasn’t the kind of tingle that had anything to do with the memory of Gabriel’s trickery and all the times he’d had to watch Dean die it was more like a ... force? Like he wasn’t alone in the room. But, it was _familiar_ , if not still unsettling. He wanted to shout out, but not to alarm his brother, so he grabbed the gun under his pillow and made a circle.

Just like that, it was gone.

He frowned, as he sat down on the bed.

Then frowned even deeper as he heard his brother’s loud, obnoxious singing from the bathroom. He rolled his eyes, but caught a blue flashing on his cell. After reading the text, he knew they had a case.

\-------------

Even if she wasn’t happy about it, Castiel was Hannah’s _leader_ , and she was going to remain by his side and assist him in any way that she could. If this was where his attentions lied these days, so be it. She was going to be an asset. She wasn’t going to stand in his way, she was determined to see his mission through to the end, even if it made her more than a little uncomfortable. Just the thought of an angel and a human being romantically involved made her vessel’s skin crawl, but she had to remind herself that Castiel had been walking among the humans much longer than she. He had been _human_ before, when she hadn’t.

There must be a method to his madness, and if this is what he wished...

The device in front of her, though it took some explaining, and Castiel had only recently mastered it, was called a ‘laptop.’ It was even more foreign than the concept of love, but much more workable, in her opinion. This was a tool she could _use_ , not something she had to _understand_. She had decided to look at this, the same way the Winchesters looked at their ‘cases’ and ‘research.’

Since Metatron had filled Castiel’s brain with the pop culture the angels hadn’t been concerned with, the other angel had been _obsessed_ with the idea. Since ‘Dean loves pop culture,’ and ‘I can finally understand his references’ it ‘must be the way to win him over.’

So here Hannah was, searching through this additional concept called ‘the internet,’ trying to figure out what love was, and how she could use what human-made fiction Castiel could incorporate into this idea of his. Half of what she found was sheer _lunacy_ , but she kept that to herself as she clicked away. She couldn’t decipher what was relevant, and what wasn’t, so as Castiel flipped through a book (which was actually to help the brothers with a case) she decided to read a few of her findings out loud.

“" _After all... I'm just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her_."" She read out loud, waiting for a reaction.

Castiel didn’t look up from his work, “That doesn’t apply, my vessel is male. Notting Hill is a good example, though, you’re doing very well, Hannah.”

She inwardly smiled at the praise, but then frowned. “I do not understand. I attempted to look up romantic movie quotes, and Along Came Polly came up. Not a bit of this sounds pleasant.”

At this, Castiel did, indeed, lift his head and recite, “ _Since we have been together I have felt more uncomfortable, out of place, embarrassed, and just physically sick than I have in my entire life. But I could not have gone through that, I could not have thrown up 19 times in 48 days if I was not in love with you._ "

“And you’d be willing to do this?” She deadpanned, trying to keep the judgment out of her voice, “For a human like _him_?”

Castiel shrugged, and actually smiled.

“I’ve done much, _much_ more. But I don’t think this is the time to quote myself, about hell, rebellion, and other such things. Please continue, and get up to speed, if you wish to help, Hannah. I’m researching chimeras.”

She steeled her nerved and looked back down to the glowing screen. Maybe her leader really _was_ insane, and this had been a terrible idea. Never the less, she continued to read on.

\-------

Dean smacked his hand, as hard as he dared, against the side of Baby’s radio as John Legend’s “ _All Of Me_ ” continued to play through the speakers.

“What the hell, Sam?! How did you do this?! The tapes won’t work, the station won’t change, hell, I can’t even get the damn thing to turn off!” He couldn’t focus on the road, “Is this witch craft?! Quick, look for a hex bag, I can’t deal with this right now, Baby’s crying, I can’t do this to her!”

Sam shrugged with a grin on his face, “No way, dude, I actually like this song. Hey, have you heard from Cas about that chimera thing?”

“Nah, he said he’s looking into it. Gonna meet us there.” Dean forced a grin. “Funny as hell he’s into texting now, huh?”

“Yeah, angel with a cellphone. Weird.”

“Yeah, weird.” Dean snorted.

What he didn’t mention was he didn’t _just_ get the chimera text. It got weirder.

Weird like:

_Meet u @ location_  
 _Doing research_  
 _U make me want 2 be a better man_

_All right, Jack Nicholson._  But Dean didn’t reply. He just assumed Cas meant something about the book work since they always throw it on Sam. He’d just text him back once they arrived, anyway.

Even if he didn’t want to admit it, he thought it was kind of cute, imagining Cas squinting and poking at a phone to text him. But, nope. Never admitting that. Never.

So he concentrated on the fact that the damn song had finally changed.

But it had changed to a sappy Bruno Mars song.

_Fuck his life._

\------------

Castiel suggested Hannah stay behind and continue her own research as he headed out to assist the Winchesters with the chimera, which proved easier than he thought with his newly recharged grace. It was _almost_ as easy as a salt and burn. Minus the few times Cas was too busy thinking of a good one-liner to throw Dean’s way, while, instead, he was getting _thrown_ into a _wall_.

Which ‘killed the mood,’ no matter how good of a line he came up with.

It was extremely unfortunate.

But in the end, when they all made it back to the hotel room, and he was able to heal their wound, it was worth it.

Cas wasn't sure if it was being human, or when his feelings for Dean had grown, but he took his time healing the older Winchester, and tried to avoid looking at the mark on his forearm. He felt his hands lingering over the lacerations, and when he looked up to see Dean blushing slightly, he smiled, and tapped the healed flesh lightly.

“I must return to Heaven,” this was the 'excuse' he was using when he was returning to Hannah. Things had been relatively quiet upstairs lately, but he didn’t want to overstay his welcome.

Which was why when Dean grumbled, “Yeah, hop right back up there to your cloud, Cas,” that he tilted his head in confusion.

“What?”

Sam was getting washed up in the bathroom, and Dean looked to make sure the door was closed as he continued, “I know the demon thing freaked you out, but you don’t have to avoid me. You’re not going to catch a _Hell-disease_ or something from being around me, you know.”

“I don’t understand,” and he really  _didn't_ , “I’m not trying to avoid you, there are just things in Heaven that-”

“All right, fearless leader.” That was Dean’s ‘I’m done with this conversation’ tone of voice, “Try to make time for the little people, once in a while. Have fun.”

There was hurt in his voice, and Cas couldn't comprehend where it was coming from. He wasn't _trying_ to hurt Dean, not by any stretch of the imagination, he was trying to bring him closer. He just needed more time, he needed to be more prepared, to do this right, to show him how much he cared and wanted to--

“You can go,” Dean’s voice was still rough, but when he smacked him on the arm to snap him out of his daze, his hand lingered a bit too, and ended up sliding down the length of the trench coat slowly until it just kind of flopped on the bed, “I’ll let you know if there’s a case. Or something. Yeah.”

Castiel felt hot where Dean touched him, and rushed his final goodbye, “Here’s looking at you, kid,” before he vanished.

That was right when Sam walked out of the bathroom with his eyebrows furrowed.

“Wait... Did I just hear that right?”

Dean blinked, and looked over his shoulder, “Dude, I don’t know. Must be a weird angel thing.”

“Yeah.” Sam towel dried his hair, “He already left?”

“Yep.” It was a snippy response that Sam recognized all too well.

“Dude,” he tossed the towel to the bed, “Were you having a _Destiel_ moment, or something?”

“Shut up.”

Sam grinned, “Were you _trying_ to?”

“Why is that even a thing?!”

“It’s my new favorite thing, actually.”

“Bitch.”

“Jerk.”

\-----------

“I may be making some headway,” Castiel announced, as he arrived back to see Hannah hunched over the laptop, looking as focused as ever, with a stack of notes next to her.

She glanced up and inquired, “Yes?”

“I’ve used a few quotes that Dean seems to be responding to and recognizing. He was also decently upset about my departure,” his voice was excited, which confused the other angel to no end.

“Why is the fact that he’s upset a positive thing?”

“As in the movies, and most of pop culture, I'm doing what's called playing ‘ _hard to get_.’” Castiel explained, with his air quotes and gestured to the pad of paper in front of the woman, “If you haven’t come across that in your research, it’d be helpful to write down, as it’s a common theme and plot device used in story telling.”

“’Disregarding affections and causing emotional distress to protagonist,’” she read out loud as she wrote in perfect cursive on the piece of paper, “Does that summarize well?”

“Yes, that is very good, Hannah.”

She lit up at the compliment, and excitedly flipped through her notebook, “While you were gone, I thought of an idea,” once she found the page, she looked for confirmation to continue, “You deal with vengeful spirits on a regular basis correct? What if we were to set up the plot of one of the classic romantic tragedy’s and make it look like a case? You’ve said before you’re decently sure he feels the same way about you, he’s merely not open to the thought of pursuing it. A case like this may spur thoughts in Dean’s mind about what it would be like to lose you and not act on these thoughts.” She set her notebook down and awaited her superior’s thoughts.

He let it roll over in his mind, and nodded over and over, “I think that’s perfect,” his grin flipped into a frown, after he thought about it for a while “but _logistically_ , how shall we go about faking a vengeful spirit? I highly doubt there are any cases that fit specific descriptions of romantic tragedies that the brothers haven’t already taken care of.”

“I’ve spoke with a few angels who have taken up vessels on Earth,” she explained, “One is already a reporter, who could write up a false article, because she informed me anything can make it into the paper these days.”

“And the vengeful spirits?”

She hesitated, “I may have recruited two angels who wish to try their hand at acting?”

“’Try their hand?’” Castiel repeated. “Why have you worded that in the form of a question?”

“I believe they just want an excuse to come down and see Earth. And if this is their chance, they’re willing to do anything.”

Cas pinched the bridge of his nose. “Just get them a copy of the film. And have them watch it. As many times as they can before they attempt to ‘act,’ please.”

He had a feeling this wasn't going to turn out the way he hoped. In theory, it sounded wonderful. But when it came to angels exercising free will, let alone 'acting' which would be the same as 'pretending' which meant 'lying,' in a way, he wasn't sure _how_ this would go.

But he had to _try_.

At least angels could make themselves appear to be ghost-like.

As long as they didn’t open their mouths...

\--------

“Dude! Check this out!” Dean clicked down the page of an article he found online and frowned. “This _can’t_ be real.”

Sam walked over and peered over his shoulder, “What do you mean? That’s a reputable paper, it’s not a tabloid so- ... _Woah_.”

“See what I mean?!”

“Dude, this is straight out of Romeo and Juliet.” He stared at the computer, reading through the article while running a hand through his hair. “Only thing that’s changed is their names are Roman Montage and Julia Chaplain. This is a _joke_. This has to be a joke, right?”

“That’s what I’m saying! But, I mean, there were killings in town of,” he scrolled through the page and frowned, “Bernard Montage, Tyler Chaplain, and _Mercutio_. The hell, straight up _Mercutio_ , not even some dumb pseudo!”

“Well, how else could you really change _Mercutio_?”

“It’s not April Fool’s, is it?” Dean looked at Sam with pleading eyes, “Because really-”

“I can assure you, this isn’t a farce,” Castiel appeared out of nowhere, leaning over the computer right where the two brother’s were, causing them both to jump a mile high, “At least it shows where their remains are, at the Chaplain crypt.”

“A _crypt_!” Dean throws his hands up in the air. “A goddamn _crypt_!”

“Looks like we’re on our way to _Verona_ , Wisconsin.”

“Fuckin’ star-crossed lovers.”

\----------

After questioning the locals, (more ‘actors’ Hannah recruited) it appeared to the Winchesters that Bernard, Tyler and Mercutio had, indeed, existed, and were killed in _familiar_ literary circumstances that no one could quite believe, but were confirmed when they examined the bodies. Next thing, they needed to rent a boat, because the crypt was only accessible by the lake in fair Verona.

They ended up striking a deal at a local fisherman’s shop for a cheap speed boat to get this ridiculous job over and done with. Castiel was being strange again, dropping hints about how tragic it was when two lovers died without being able to truly be together.

When they were stepping onto the boat, he even said, “"Death cannot stop true love. All it can do is delay it for a while."

It was Sam, this time, who laughed out, “Metatron did a number on you, quoting the _Princess Bride._ ”

“Hey!” Dean admonished, “Don’t you hate on the classics! That was a good one, Cas,” and he swung an arm around the angel’s shoulders, “Let the hater’s hate.”

Cas nodded quickly, both Dean and Sam deliberately ignored him as he responded, "I'm just gonna shake. Shake. Shake. Shake. Shake? I shake it off."  They still exchanged incredulous looks, and as they boarded, Sam took a seat behind the wheel as Dean worked to undock the boat. As they rode out, the piece of land, which started out as greenery gave way to a cement building, all the way to the left. Dean didn't notice at first, because he was still trying to 'shake off' the fact that his friend had just quoted _fucking Taylor Swift_.

“Well, there she is. Rich fuckers, might as well have come from the Capulet's or Montague's.“ Dean groaned as gestured to a small stone monument, and then he pointed to the right, “Looks like we’ll be able to dock over there, but we’ve gotta be careful and grab our iron ASAfuckingP because it’s a hike before we can salt and burn these idiots.”

“Yeah, and as soon as we hit land, they’ll be able to come at us,” Sam shouted back over the waves, from where he was steering, “Hopefully there’s the objects we need to destroy left behind in there if they were cremated. This would be a pain in the ass to search.”

The older brother nodded, and started looking over the stretch of land, just to see what they were up against. He was putting together the story, what they had gathered from the towns people to make this as easy as possible. He didn’t want to have anything jump out at them, and they have to swim back, or something. Hopefully Julia and Roman weren’t swimmers. If he could avoid Cas' teleportation method at the end of the day, he'd like to do _that_.

Dean nearly jerked _into_ the water, when all of a sudden, there was an _angel_ behind him, at the bow of the _tiny little_ speedboat asking into his ear, “Does it feel like you’re flying, Dean?”

“What the _fuck_ , Cas?!” He sputtered, “Are you _trying_ to scare the shit out of me?!”

“No,” he frowned, trench coat flapping in the wind, “I just thought that when human’s did this,” he raised his arms out, body still practically _flush_ with Dean’s backside, “It felt like they were flying. You should try it.”

Dean raised an eyebrow, and looked _thoroughly_ unimpressed, “You look like Jesus on the fuckin’ cross, dude. And you know I hate flying,” he pushed passed, but stumbled a little in his attempts to get away. “Dammit!”

Cas reached out, and grabbed Dean by the wrist to steady him and pull him back to regain his balance.

“Thanks, man.”

“I’ll never let go, Dean, I’ll never-”

“Ready to dock!” Sam shouted, awkwardly breaking up whatever the hell was going on at the bow of the boat, “Let’s get the rock salt and iron together!”

Dean stared at Cas, who pursed his lips, and did, indeed let go. “I’ll grab the salt.”

“Yeah,” Dean licked his lips, before turning away and clearing his throat, I’ll, just- uh, yeah.”

\----------

“I don’t get it...” Sam suspiciously looked around as they walked through the trees and foliage towards the crypt, “Nothing’s jumped out at us yet, you’d think that these vengeful spirits would be knocking us over by now, we’re practically _at their door_.”

“Yeah, this is _really_ weird,” Dean confirmed, sawed-off in hand as he kept his eyes scanning the forest.

Castiel could see Hannah ahead of them at the gates, even if she was invisible to the Winchesters and nodded at her, as he commented casually, “Maybe they’re just treasuring their time together before we end it for them.”

“Geez, Cas, you act like _we’re_ the ones ruining their romance, do you not remember they _killed_ those people in to--”

_“Julia, where for art thou Julia-”_

The strangely deadpanned voice echoed through the trees and immediately, everyone was on guard.

_“Oh, Roman!”_

An even _more_ dead-panned voice responded.

“Uhh...”

“They’re here!” Castiel tried to get them moving, and sound urgent, but the brother’s just looked around, confused, because even though the voices were surrounding them, there was nothing ‘vengeful’ about them.  They sounded almost... bored?

Cas _knew_ this was going to happen, so he tried harder, “We need to burn the bodies,” and rushed to the doors.

Suddenly, Sam was knocked backwards by an invisible force, which happened to be _Hannah_ who took Castiel’s clue, and not the ‘spirits’ who _still_ seemed to be _rehearsing lines_.

But the men didn’t know that.

“Shit! Sam!” Dean spun around, finally feeling a cold spot, and sent a bullet into the space where it came from.

Hannah rolled her eyes from where she was invisible and gave Dean enough of a ‘push’ to knock him into Castiel.

Both went tumbling through the dirt, and wound up basically tangle in Cas’ trench coat, fighting to get up, but found a single moment to lock eyes. And, _damn_ , if Cas didn’t want to kiss him _right then and there_ , because somehow, he’d ended up _pinning_ Dean to the ground.

However, Dean thought this was a real job, and shoved Cas off immediately, even if there was a hesitant pause, and shouted, “Come on! We gotta get into that building!”

“R-Right.”

Dean charged over, and grabbed Sam by the wrist to yank him up, as they all ran to the doors of the crypt. Castiel was the one to reach it first and used his shoulder to shove the doors open, and as soon as the inside was revealed so were the half-translucent shapes of two ‘spirits.’ They were looking 'longingly' (but completely _unconvincingly_ ) into each other’s eyes, standing on top two coffins in the middle of the room.  Which were the only coffins in the entire 'crypt.'

_“What's in a name? that which we call a rose_  
 _By any other name would smell as sweet.”_

And not paying attention to the three _at all_. The newcomers, who made a dramatic entrance, were huffing and puffing, adrenaline-rushing through their veins by the attack outside, and now these two ghosts _weren’t even looking at them._ Just having a, staring contest?, with each other.

_“Death, that hath suck'd the honey of thy breath hath had no power yet upon thy beauty.”_

Castiel could feel Hannah’s presences behind them, and knew this was going downhill _fast_. So she pushed another gust of cold air into the room, surrounding them, and pulled up a whirl wind of power. Sam went tumbling back to the ground, and crashed into the stone coffin on the left with a pained shout, his head hitting with a thud.

And a much _lighter_ push knocked Cas and Dean over.

Right into the position they had been in before, with _Cas pinning Dean to the ground_.

" _This isn’t subtle at all!"_  Cas hissed at Hannah through his mind, and Dean looked up at him with even more confusion than before, and Cas quickly rolled off the man he was attempting to woo.

" _I apologize._ "

This time, for real, she sent Castiel flying into a wall so hard it cracked the stone and pieces of rubble shattered to the ground as he hit the floor with the concrete. It was  _almost too strong_ for a ghost, and Hannah knew that.  She was being a smart ass, plain and simple.

“Cas! Sammy!”

" _Is that more believable?_ "

Castiel couldn’t even respond, as he tried to get back up, but it ended with him coughing up blood instead. Even from his prone form on the ground, he could still fling his hand out, and with it, a slice of grace to pitch the lids of the coffins open, knocking over the actor angels sitting on top of them, “Dean! Sam! _Burn them!_ ”

The younger Winchester was in the perfect position to hoist himself up, and tug out the salt that he had strapped in his coat. While he was spreading it, and Dean was dumping the gasoline, there was one more ‘whoosh’ around the crypt, but they were able to light the ( _conveniently_ dry bones) on fire before another attack came.

Both spirits, in unison, stated, “ _Parting is such sweet sorrow_ ,” awkwardly hugged each other, and then lit up in flames.

There weren’t even _screams_.

They were just _on fire_...

...Kissed each other once...

... And then vanished.

Dean and Sam stared at each other in disbelief, while Cas banged his head backwards on the wall, _twice_ , and thanked his Father that was _over_.

“I must return to Heaven!” He announced, and then was gone.

\--------------

Dean was tossing and turning as he attempted to get to sleep. It hadn’t been exactly _easy_ lately. There was too much weighing on his mind, before the whole _demon thing_ and not being able to sleep at all, the human thing was rough all over again. Even before, sleep came difficult for him, and now it seemed downright _impossible_. He couldn’t help but worry about Cas, too.

It had been over a week since he had seen the angel in person. And up until then, he had been acting _weird_.

Was it a side effect of the grace? Was he going crazy?

Everyone was so worried about babying _Dean_ , and the damn mark, when they should be more worried about Cas and _his_ struggle, it seemed like a joke.

But, _fuck_ , Dean was probably worried enough about Cas for _all_ of them.

Which had him tossing and turning.

He laid on his back and took in a few deep breaths, trying to calm himself down and just relax, because nothing he was doing seemed to be working anyway.

He wasn’t going to stare at the ceiling and brood. He wasn’t going to go out and get shit-faced drunk. He had to handle this the normal way.

But damn, if he didn’t miss the angel.

It all he could think about.

The last time he saw him with that stupid, weirdo salt-and-burn. That moment he could have sworn the man’s eyes lingers on his lips _a bit too long_ in the heat of battle and he was going to lean down and kiss him-

\- he could feel his body relax, as he sunk into the idea.

What if Cas really _had_ kissed him?

What if they  _weren't_  in the middle of some twisted Shakespeare mission, and it was just the two of them, in that position?

He let his mind wander back to the woods. With Cas on top of him. But this go around, time fell away, and Cas leaned down and closed the gap between them. It was tentative at first, almost like a question, but Dean wasn’t in the mood for games. He surged upward and kissed Cas like he meant it. He bit the angel’s lower lip and sucked it into his mouth, grinning as he heard the man gasp.

Dean could almost _feel_ that damn trench coat tangled around them again, and set work to ripping it away. He wanted to _feel_ Cas.

Had wanted to for a _long_ time.

He shifted them enough, so he could bend his knees and pull the angel between them. One of Cas’ hands tangled though the short locks at the base of Dean’s head while the other braced his weight against the grass as he kissed him for all he was worth. Dean took advantage of their position and tugged the dress shirt from where it was tucked in the angel’s pants so his hands could roam over the bare, muscled skin of Cas’ back. His nails raked from his taut shoulders, until they gripped at his waist and Dean arched his hips upward.

Cas moaned, almost breathlessly, and sunk his teeth into Dean’s neck. He sucked marks into the tender flesh, and it was Dean’s turn to be reduced to a series of whimpers and gasps.

_Fuck_ , did Cas know how to use his mouth.

The first grind had been meant to _tease_ , but now he couldn’t stop if he wanted to.

Every thrust up, was met with an equally rough thrust down, and soon, the angel was ripping Dean’s shirt off and kissing down his chest.

Dean chuckled, “Buy a guy dinner, first,” but took advantage of the movement and yanked the neatly pressed shirt off, sending buttons flying.

He was unashamed to stare as Cas teased at his pants, watching his perfectly toned muscles flex and relax as he went. Dean could feel his mouth water at the sight, and suddenly, even if he _did_ want to be naked, he wanted his mouth on Cas _even more._ As soon as his fly was unzipped, he moved.

Dean squeezed Cas with his legs and flipped them over, easily finding the trench coat to lay on (and hopefully dirty up _immediately_ ). The angel looked alarmed, suddenly on his back, the other man wearing a devilish smirk on top of him.

“What are you-”

“It’s my turn,” Dean held Castiel’s face with both hands and kissed him deep, and passionately, while grinding down on him, the friction _that much better_ now that it was only his boxers keeping his erection confined. He reached down to cup Castiel’s hardness and whispered against his cheek, “Unless you’re not into it, but it _feels_ like you are.”

Castiel thrust against his hand and moaned, “I’m very, very into it.”

“Tell me what you wanna do, Cas,” Dean asked, innocently, his hand slipping down the front of the other man’s pants to take his naked cock in hand, “If you’re _so_ into it.”

“Dean,” Cas threw his head back and tried to arch into Dean’s grasp, begging for more friction, “Wanna do _you_.”

That answer made Dean shiver from his head to his toes.

He pulled his hands out of Cas’ pants and took no time at all to yank them off completely, and get the angel fully naked in record time. Dean’s mouth was dry as he took in the sight before him, and his cock ached where it was still straining in his boxers. Cas was a beautiful sight, every single inch of him. He wasted no time leaning down and taking _quite a few_ of those beautiful inches into his mouth and down his throat.

Almost at the same time Cas made the most amazing sound Dean had heard in his life, Dean found himself spun around by angelic strength and, now angel-mojo’d naked, there was a tongue lapping at his entrance. He hummed around Cas’ cock, because, _holy fuck_ , he was basically sixty-nine-ing with an _angel_. His brain was still catching up with the fact that ‘ _Cas wanted to do him’_ but it all became _very_ real when he felt a finger teasing around his opening next to that tongue. It dipped in ever so slightly, and Dean wiggled his hips in invitation to keep going.

It wasn’t until Cas was three-deep, finger fucking the hell out of him that he couldn’t take it anymore and started begging, “C’mon, _need_ it. Or else you’re gonna make me lose it right now.”

Cas gladly took that order to manhandle Dean until he was on his hands and knees on the ground, ass up in the air and teased him right back, “Need what?”

He pumped his fingers in and out, nailing that part of Dean that was exactly what was gonna ‘make him lose it,’ and he tried to pull away. “Cas, come on, please. _Please_.”

When Cas finally did, he heard the angel spit on his palm, and soon, felt the thick head of his cock lining up, “This is what you need?”

“So bad,” Dean tried to push back on his haunches to speed along the process, but he didn’t have to, because Cas was done with teasing too, “ _Fuck_!”

The angel slid in with a little resistance, but once he bottomed out, spread kisses along Dean’s back and reached to take Dean in his fist. He started slowly pumping Dean before he moved, because he was just _so tight_ he didn’t want to hurt him. Dean started to relaxed and arched back against Castiel, demanding more friction.

So Cas gave it to him.

He used his free hand to grip Dean’s hip as he started _relentlessly_ pounding into him. Dean bucked back to meet each and every thrust, moaning out with abandon that echoed through the woods. The sound of their sweating bodies slapping together was obscene and the noises Cas was making, combined with everything else was dragging Dean closer and closer to the edge.

“Cas, ‘m gonna...” Dean breathlessly moaned, and he wasn’t lying.

He was right on the brink-

“Cum for me, Dean,” Cas demanded, sucking at Dean’s earlobe, and then biting at his neck, added possessively, “Only for me-”

Dean jerked awake, staring at the ceiling with his blood running hot and his pulse racing. He swallowed hard and looked frantically around the room, thanking god Sam was still asleep.

Because he had a mess to clean up in his pants.

_Fuck._


	2. Love Means Never Having To Say You're Sorry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _When they trudged back to the hotel, Sam slipped a key card into Cas’ hand and explained that he got another hotel room they could talk in, because it needed to be done pronto, and Castiel agreed. As soon as Dean turned the corner, Cas toyed with the edge of the card and sighed, “I should have come to you first, when I put my plan of seducing your brother into action.”_
> 
> _Sam tripped over his feet and his shoulder knocked into a wall. His eyes were as wide as saucers as Cas went on, “I knew Hannah wouldn’t be enough help. So I hope we can discuss this tonight, and you’ll be able to help me.”_
> 
> _The younger brother’s mouth opened and closed a few times because, really? Did Cas just say that? Out loud? In the middle of this hallway? With Dean just barely out of earshot?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd originally planned to complete this in three parts, but at this point... I have no idea how long it's going to be. Too many ideas for three chapters. Enjoy part two of painful awkwardness xoxo

Castiel returned to meet Hannah with a renewed vigor and stony expression of determination on his face. He marched into the room, met with alarm as he announced, “Dean and I just had sexual intercourse.”

“What?!” She demanded, her voice squeaking in a way she hadn’t thought possible. Had that noise really come from her? She cleared her throat and then tried to school her expression, “Excuse me, Castiel. I meant, that’s wonderful. But you haven’t seen him in a week, how did this happen?”

“I thought he was praying to me,” Castiel was pacing, he was buzzing with energy and couldn’t will himself to take a seat as he explained to Hannah, “Only, it was his subconscious. He was dreaming. But it was a waking dream, where he was still aware and in control of his actions. He wasn’t fully asleep yet, he hadn’t reached his REM cycle he-”

“I understand. Please, continue.”

“It was like a prayer. He was calling to me, so I answered and-” he shook his head, “it’s what humans call a ‘wet dream.’”

“I’ve come across that in my research.“ She nodded, “Although, it may not count, and it might not have been quite real, this _does_ confirm your theory he feels the same way about you.”

“Exactly!” Castiel threw his arms up with a smile on his face. “I hope he doesn’t regret-”

“He’ll probably remember it as, you said, ‘ _a wet dream._ ’ Even though it was very much consensual,” she tried to smile and match his enthusiasm, but this wasn't a topic she had planned on discussing with her superior. One thing was clear, though, “Maybe we can be a bit more aggressive with our plan now.”

“Yes. Yes, I will attempt to see him very soon.”

\----------

“What’s that noise?” Dean raised an eyebrow, as wiped the ‘monster-of-the-week’ blood from his knife and frowned. “Wait, I _know_ that.”

He continued cleaning his weapons and hummed along with the song, until he looked up and laughed, “Is that ‘In Your Eyes?’ I swear to God, that better be coming from some kind of car with the windows down and volume up too loud because if some kind of douche is out in the parking lot with a boom box, you gotta know, she’s just not that into you, bro. Hah,” he wrapped a final knife with cloth and tucked it away, “I _gotta_ see this-”

But it was Sam who beat him to the window and barely opened it, because he had this _sneaking suspicious_. These last few weeks had been _too_ weird. And he couldn’t let this happen, if what he thought was happen, really _was_ happening.

And sure as shit.

_It was._

Cas was in the parking lot.

Face as stone serious as he had been facing down Lucifer in the apocalypse. Even _more_ serious than he had been in the face of Metatron, when taking back heaven. This was a new kind of intensity.

He had his trench coat sleeves rolled up past his elbows, arms over top of his head.

Holding a goddamn boom box.

About two feet away from the window. Of their first floor hotel room.

Sam’s eyes widened and he mouthed, _'What the fuck! Stop now! Get away!'_

The angel tilted his head to the side in confusion, but zapped off, right as Dean threw open the curtains and peeked around.

“Huh,” he raised an eyebrow. “Must’ve been a car that drove off.”

“Y-Yeah.” Sam stuttered and cleared his throat, quickly trying to change the subject, “Haven’t heard that song in a while.”

“Yeah, I actually kind of hate that song,” Dean commented casually, “Wanna get some food?”

Sam nodded much too quickly, “Yeah. Food. Got it. Right.”

What the hell was going on.

\-----------

It wasn’t until Sam knew Dean was asleep, that he slowly got out of bed and sneaked out of the hotel room. He didn't bother grabbing his cell, all it would take to get a certain angel's attention was a short pray or merely mentioning his name. He _knew_ Castiel was lingering, because he would appear every chance he got.

When they asked a question out loud, just the two of them, about a case, he would pop in to answer, then need to ‘return to Heaven.‘

When Baby almost ran out of gas, and they thought they’d be stranded on the side of a freeway, Cas magically appeared, filled the tank, and then ‘returned to Heaven.‘

Fuck, one time, Dean said he was craving Chinese, and suddenly, a _damn banquet_ appeared, Cas didn’t even show up, just a note, ‘ _Busy in Heaven_.’

Needless to say, Sam was at his wits end.

He walked out into the parking lot, and cleared his throat, “Cas. I know you’re here. And I know we can’t really talk now. But I’m not quite sure what the fuck you’re doing, but cut it out. Tomorrow. We’ve got a case two towns over. Make yourself scarce until then, we’ll talk it out after.”

Sam knew he had been heard, as a gust of wind blew through the parking lot. He nodded to himself and took in a deep breath as he walked back in.

Now, he needed to sort out his thoughts about all this bullshit before tomorrow.

Angels were going to be the death of him.

\------------

Two towns over, happened to be a coven of witches, who didn’t know what they were getting themselves into, and Cas actually managed to turn them to the Word of God, rather than the practices of evil. It was a strange way to handle it, but regardless, all were impressed. Dean didn’t want to admit it, being _more than a little_ pissed off he had barely seen the angel more than a few flutters in for no more than 30 seconds at a time over the past week.

Still, seeing Cas was good. Even though his mind kept going back to the dream he’d had a few nights ago. He couldn’t help lingering next to Cas when he was close, letting their staring competitions go a little _longer_ than usual, and if he found himself _almost_ willing to forgive him... So sue him. He wasn’t sure what made him say it, but he found himself mumbling:

“Dude, we talked about this before. You gotta stop disappearing so much. _Especially_ with that depleting grace thing you’ve got going on. So quit it, all right?”

Cas shrugged, casually, “I wish I knew how to quit you.”

_That_ was the breaking point. The one, final thing, that solidified _everything_ in Sam’s mind and made him _freeze_. With each syllable that came out of Cas’ mouth, there was no doubt left in his mind.

Dean laughed heartily, “Yeah, buddy, a lot of people wish they knew how to quit me, but once you’re stuck with me, you’re stuck!” He teasingly patted him on the back. “So it’s a deal.”

On the inside, Dean was freaking out. He wasn’t going to do anything. He _couldn’t_. Not _now_. Not with a full house, staring at him.

Which was not what Sam, nor Castiel was expecting, or hoping for. Sam gulped, and Castiel looked frustrated all over again.

Why wasn’t this working?!

\---------

When they trudged back to the hotel, Sam slipped a key card into Cas’ hand and explained that he got another hotel room they could talk in, because it needed to be done _pronto_ , and Castiel agreed. As soon as Dean turned the corner, Cas toyed with the edge of the card and sighed, “I should have come to you first, when I put my plan of seducing your brother into action.”

Sam tripped over his feet and his shoulder knocked into a wall. His eyes were as wide as saucers as Cas went on, “I knew Hannah wouldn’t be enough help. So I hope we can discuss this tonight, and you’ll be able to help me.”

The younger brother’s mouth opened and closed a few times because, _really_? Did Cas just say that? Out loud? In the middle of this hallway? With Dean just _barely_ out of earshot?

“Uh. Yeah. I’ll stop by later. I’ll help, if you stock that damn fridge with beer. And lots of it.”

“Of course,” Cas had slapped on his mission face, and turned the corner, “I’ll see you soon.”

“What? No goodbye, or cheesy one-liner to Dean?” Sam raised an eyebrow, then couldn't help but tease, “He’s gonna think you flew the coupe, dude.”

Castiel slowly turned around, looking cautious. Was this a test? He then schooled his expression into something much more serious, and explained, like it was the most obvious thing in the world, “"Love means never having to say you're sorry,” then turned and finished with, “I’m off to procure alcohol.”

Sam just chuckled and shook his head. Right when he disappeared Dean had, apparently, doubled back and demanded, “What the hell are you two asshats doing?”

“Cas is procuring alcohol,” Sam stated in a mockingly gravely voice, because he knew the angel was going about this all wrong.

“Good. That’s good.”

Beer, was always a good way to win Dean over. Cas needed to change his approach if he ever wanted a chance.

\---------

Castiel did, indeed, procure alcohol, but didn’t stop in the room to drop it off, which pissed Dean off, because it just magically, no, _angelically_ appeared in the motel room refrigerator. Like the Chinese food. Which, yep. Pissed him off. Cas was ignoring him again. And this time, he couldn’t just ‘deal with it.’ He slammed the door shut without even grabbing a beer and reached for his coat and the keys to the Impala.

“Where are you going?” Sam raised an eyebrow, as he reopened the fridge, and understood immediately.

Dean was butt-hurt he didn’t get to see the angel himself.

“Bar. Haven’t been out in a while. You coming?” His words were clipped, and was already halfway out the door, before Sam even had the chance to decline.

Which he did.

“Fine. Don’t wait up.”

Sam sat there for a second, until he heard the rumble of the engine and knew Dean was gone. He was trying to come up with a good excuse to meet up with Cas anyway, but this may have been two steps back. Cas could have thought he was leaving it there as a gift was a gesture of 'love' or whatever, and was merely awaiting Sam’s arrival for the meeting, but _Dean_ didn’t know that. It looked, to Dean, like a slap in the face, like Cas didn’t want to see him, or hang out with them at all.

Oh, if he _only_ knew the full story.

But speaking of, _Sam_ didn’t even know the full story, so the time was now. He hopped up and grabbed the other card from his pocket to head down the hall and demand Cas just what the fuck he’d been thinking these days.

And try to fix what he could.

\--------

“So. You’re in love with my brother.” Sam strolled in the room, and counted two angels, sitting, silently waiting. “More beer in this fridge?”

“Yes.” Castiel nodded. “T-to both accounts.”

“Well, you’ve been showing it in a pretty weird way lately, Cas. Let‘s get you on a better track, all right? Because right now, I‘m damn sure he thinks you've lost your mind. And while in his own, weird Dean way, he might think it‘s ‘cute‘ or something, that not the way to win him over, or whatever.”

"I'm at a loss, which is why I'm glad you‘re offering your help. You're his brother, you'd know what the best course of action would be."

Sam snorted, because this was all too much to take in as he rounded the corner and grabbed himself a beer. After he carelessly shut the fridge, he looked at the thoroughly distraught look on the angel's face, and the blank expression (which he had come to find as normal) on Hannah‘s. He took a deep breath, because this was about to get interesting. He could tell Castiel the normal way to go about these things like, oh, say, just coming out with it and telling someone how you were feeling. 

But, if he were honest, this was the most fun he'd had in a long time. Plus, anything to keep avoiding the big 'Mark of Cain' talk was positive, and this was a pretty good detour.

"All right. So let's go over why your one-liners, Titanic moment, and that Romeo and Juliet thing that _had_ to be you, right, went over his head, and start there. Talk through it, see the down fall," Sam twisted open his beer, "Oh, hey, do you guys want any?"

Cas shook his head, while Hannah tilted hers to the side, in confusion.

Sam decided to take that as a yes, and grabbed another for the woman, “Oh, and before we get too far. Brokeback Mountain was awkward enough. But never. Ever. _Ever_. Quote Taylor Swift again.”

“Yes. I realized that was a mistake, soon after it had happened. It was a miscalculation on my part.”

“Good, at least you’re learning.”

"I feel as though these normal pop culture references are escaping Dean's understanding, more than likely because he's never been able to experience a normal life," Cas clasped his hands together and rested his chin on his folded fists, "I believe the only way to find something that will relate to him will have to be something that he's more familiar with."

"You mean something along the lines of _our_ kind of work?" Sam raised an eyebrow, and opened the beer for Hannah before handing it to her.

She took a sip, and look appalled, "Another thing I will never understand about humans." But when Sam shrugged and tried to take it back, she shoo'd him away, letting him know 'it would be rude to reject his hospitality.'

Sam rolled his eyes, leave it to Cas to bring along this strange angel and _actually_ expect her to succeed as a wing-man.

Thank god he'd finally come to Sam.

"Yes!" Cas' eyes lit up, "Maybe _then_ he'd be more understanding of my intentions, if they were portrayed in a way he dealt with regularly. He'd connect to the idea, and find it romantic, and-"

"Please-" Sam stopped him abruptly, "There is no 'romancing' my brother. He just got over being a _demon_ , all right? I'm pretty sure that's the _last_ word any of us want to hear."

"Well, I don't think you'd like me to us the words _courting_ , or _seducing_ , so I'm still trying to find something applicable to the situation-"

“How about we just use something like ‘getting together.’” Sam took a seat and sighed, before joking, “Well, there’s always romances like ‘Ghost,’ ‘City of Angels,’ wait, no, that’s basically already our lives. Or, hell, even ‘Twilight.’”

Castiel nodded, like this was a matter of life and death, “Sam, this is genius. I wish I had brought this to your attention sooner.”

“Wait, wait, are you seriously suggesting...?”

He looked up with a smile, that Sam couldn’t bare to wipe off. It'd be like kicking a kitten. So he pasted on a smile of his own.

This was going to be an interesting week.

\-----------

Dean wasn’t exactly quiet as he stumbled into the hotel room, more drunk than Sam had seen him in a while, he marched over to his bed and tripped into it. Sam was still sitting at his laptop, and decided to hold off on telling him he’d found a case until the morning. His brother wasn’t going to remember it anyway. Instead, he settled on:

“Have fun?”

“Nnnghh, gaaggergobss,” was muttered into the pillow, before he rolled onto his back like a beached whale, “Too many jager bombs.”

Sam made a face, “Dude, you _hate_ those. Almost as much as those purple nurples.”

“On special. Plus, chick’r buyin’ ‘m fer me.”

“And you didn’t go home with any of them?” He raised an eyebrow, because that was very... Un-Dean-like.

“Nope.”

“Whiskey dick?” Sam teased, “Or, maybe jager dick?”

“Nope.”

“So... What, then?” He was fishing, because he _knew_ there was something Dean wasn’t telling him, and he knew if there was a chance to get it out of him, it was when he was as blacked out as he was right now, “Holding out for someone _special_?”

“Shaddup,” Dean sat up enough to try to squirm out of his jacket, but the struggle was painful to watch.

He only managed to get one arm out, before he collapsed back into bed.

“That wasn’t a no.”

“Notta yes. But a yes. But, fuck, I’m spinnin’.” Dean slapped one hand over his eyes and grumbled out, “Too bright, lights off now.”

“Speak English, and not cave man, and maybe I will.”

“Fuck off.”

Sam sighed heavily, and leaned over, knowing he wasn’t getting anything else out of his brother tonight. But what he got was enough. Especially after the conversation he’d had with Cas earlier. The more they talked, the more signs he’d picked up on, and remembered from the past that, yeah, his brother was pretty damn obsessed with the angel too. Which was why he wasn’t taking this ‘mission’ Cas was on too seriously. The idiots were going to end up together anyway, why not have a little fun in the meantime.

“Want me to sing you a lullaby?” Sam teased one more time, but it didn’t matter, Dean was already passed out cold.

Sam groaned, and stood up to pull off his boots, and the rest of his coat. He should have gotten the brother of the year award, or something. But he needed a little good karma in his life before he helped Castiel and Hannah with their next plan. Or else, he was going to end up a toad in his next life.

It was all in good fun though, right?

\---------

Dean wasn't sure if his drunkenness followed him into his dreams, or if that was even possible, but everything was hazier than usual and... _Mistier_? Was that a thing? He tripped over a rock, which shouldn’t have been anything new, but then he was doing that _falling thing_ , but instead of jerking awake, like he usually did, he fell into a pair of arms.

_Of course,_ they were Castiel’s.

But, hell, _dream_ , right?

He didn’t question it for a second.

“Thanks,” he stood upright, but didn't let go of the man’s wrists, just kind of stared at him, “This reminds me of Purgatory. But... Nicer.”

“It’s a land of fairy magic.”

He said it with a completely blank expression, like Dean should have known this fact already.

Dean snorted, then broke down into a fit of laughter. He wiped a tear from his eye, finally breaking his connection with Cas, and mumbled, “Damn, my dream are getting stranger and stranger these days. Just- don’t grow wings or something, all right?”

“I have wings, there’s no need for me to grow another pair.”

The man started laughing again, this time harder, because he was pretty sure he was _still_ drunk, and immaturity came with the territory. Cas tilted his head, looking thoroughly confused, and nodded in understanding, “ _Oh_ , you’re intoxicated,” and then lifted two fingers to his forehead.

Dean was still laughing, but suddenly sober, which was even weirder in this dream. But he wasn’t mad. He was actually spending time with the angel, which was _obviously unrealistic_ in and of itself.

“You really think that?” Cas asked, reaching out, and cupping Dean’s cheek.

Dean raised his hand and covered Cas’ with his own, “Figures you’re in my head. Duh. I always want you around, and hate it when you’re not, and treat me like I’m some damn disease. The only way I get to see you is like this,” he snorted, “pretty pathetic, I’ve resorted to _dreaming_ about you. Feel like a dumb little love-sick bitch.”

Castiel leaned forward and shut him up with a kiss.

He didn’t want to hear Dean speak another word like that. Plus, he really, _really_ wanted to kiss him. It was a little more forceful than he intended, and he ended up backing him into a tree, which he hit hard enough to knock the wind out of the man. Dean’s kisses turned chaste before he pulled away and mumbled, “I must have a thing for forests. Fetish I never knew I had.”

The angel frowned, and, with the snap of his fingers, Dean found himself being pushed down on a four-post bed with a freakin’ _flowing_ canopy, _silk_ sheets, and that damn _fairy mist_ still surrounding them. But that wasn’t the thing that got him.

He eyed Cas with a wide grin and started, “... is _that_?”

“Memory foam,” he confirmed.

“Best dream _ever_ ,” Dean announced, and pulled the angel back down to make out ferociously, “It’ll remember _us_.”

Cas thought to himself, if this was all it took, maybe tomorrow, from here on out, he should merely add a memory foam mattress to all of Dean’s hotel room mattresses? Or maybe use that as a back-up plan...

Either way, it was good to know.

\----------

“Maybe something with demons?” Hannah suggested, as they walked to meet up with Dean at their next case, who had declared it a miracle he didn‘t have a hangover, and sprung out of bed to get a head start on the interviewing process  after Sam told him about the case, in a ridiculously good mood. “If we’re going with themes of the supernatural, that may be something he can relate to easily. Are there any movies he enjoyed which centered around demonology?”

“What the hell?” Sam’s face took on an incredulous expression, “Too soon, Hannah.”

“It’s not as though he’ll relapse,” Castiel attempted to set Sam’s mind at ease, “Although Hannah is being insensitive, she merely doesn’t understand human emotions as we do. It’s no fault of hers.”

Hannah narrowed her eyes, “Even _I_ know that was an insult, Castiel.”

Sam snorted, trying to disguise his laughter, but failing miserable, “All right, let’s all just agree, no demons, all right?”

“I was _just_ trying to help.”

“I still think this entire thing is ridiculous.”

“If you do not wish to be a part of it, you don’t have to participate,” the angel glared, “If you _recall_ , you invited _yourself_ into this so-”

“ _Chill out_ , Cas,” Sam’s amusement heightened as he took in the downright pouty look on his friend’s face, “I’m here to _help_ , all right?”

“Fine.”

“I don’t understand what lowering Castiel’s body temperature has to do with participation.”

Castiel and Sam exchanged looks.

“C’mon. You _need_ me.”

“Yes.” He agreed. “Yes, I’m realizing that now.”

\----------

“Hey guys!” Dean greeted with a smile, “So, I’m almost _positive_ we’ve got ourselves a vampire nest. But it’s weird. Because, it sounds like there’s werewolves too? But all the adults around here don’t seem to know anything about it, or are ignoring it, and the only disappearances have been high school kids. Which is shitty as hell, if this nest is targeting fuckin’ _kids_. Oh, Hannah. Hi.”

“Hi, Dean,“ Hannah had forgotten she had yet to accompany them on a case yet, even though she had been around the Winchesters for what seemed like forever, hearing about Dean every day. She leaned in and whispered to Castiel from behind where he was standing, “He seems to be in a good mood.”

Cas tilted his head and whispered back, “We had intercourse again last night.”

She nodded in understanding, and apparently, Sam had heard, because he whipped around with a yelped, “ _What_?!”

Hannah and Castiel stared. Icily. Like they were silently admonishing him, _reminding him_  he’d been let in on a _secret_ and not to blow their cover.

“Uh...” he stuttered, his face bright red, “Yeah, you guys are right, vampires and werewolves are a dangerous combination.”

“Especially if they’re working together, although I highly doubt that to be the case. It's, more than likely a rivalry. Maybe a skirmish over territory? This area would be the perfect location for both of their kind to set up a base, of sorts.” Castiel’s smile read ‘good work, Sam,’ and he continued, “But yes, it’s unfortunate that the young are being targeted. We must fix this right away.”

Dean hung back as the angel walked on ahead, and raised an eyebrow at his brother, “Are you all right, dude? You look like you’ve seen a ghost. And I gotta tell you, nothing but blood-suckers and heart-munchers in these parts, promise.”

Sam looked back wide-eyed, like there’d be _some_ kind of _tell_ on Dean if he had, _indeed_ , slept with Cas the night before. Because, from where Sam was, the man had just passed out, drunk, and slept it off. What the _hell_ were those two talking about?! As soon as they were alone, there was going to be a conversation. An _immediate_ conversation.

“Y-yeah.” Sam shook his head, and tried to snap himself out of it, “Yeah, vamps and weres, got it.”

“So,” Dean kicked a rock and gestured to the two in front of them, “Any reason why the side kick decided to join us on this little mission? Kissing Cas’ ass more than usual, or something?”

Sam raised an eyebrow, “You _jealous_?”

“No!” Dean replied almost _too_ quickly, “Why would I be...”

But then his words trailed off, as Hannah giggled, obviously flirting, and playfully wrapped an arm around Castiel’s waist as they walked and chatted.

“ _Hell_ no.”

“What was that?” Sam immediately responded.

“'Hell no,' I’m not jealous!” Dean tried to correctly, but the words had already, accidentally, left his mouth, “That’s. Uh. Good for him. Since when did Hannah know how to do _that_ , anyway?”

“Do what?”

“Be a little _harlot_.”

“Dude. You’re _totally_ jealous.”

“Nope.”

“You just called _Hannah_  a _harlot_.” Sam suddenly started laughing and couldn’t stop, “Who does that?!”

“Hey! Shut up!”

\----------

Dean was getting take-out at the diner when Sam finally confronted the two angels. He swung around from where he was riding shotgun to look at their innocent faces in the back seat.

“What the hell were you saying, about having sex with my brother?!”

“He used the word intercourse,” Hannah stated, like that made everything better and explained the entire situation. “Not ‘sex.’”

“Dean has been regularly calling me to his dreams,” Castiel admitted and shrugged, “At least it’s confirmation that he has interest in me. It makes this whole mission a lot less... _Bleak_. Or else I may have given up a while ago.”

“No, you wouldn’t.” Hannah and Sam said at the same time, then looked at each other, before Sam shook his head to go on, “All right. Now, next question. Is this ‘job’ what I think it is?”

“Maybe? It was a suggestion of _yours_ ,” Cas pointed a finger at him, “I didn’t even give it a passing thought until _you_ brought it up. In case you were wondering, this would have been a case anyway, we just tweaked some of the smaller details.”

“ _High school_ details,” Sam scoffed, “So. Where are you going with this one?”

“We were talking about relate-ability,” Hannah glanced out the window to make sure Dean wasn’t returning before she was able to deliver her explanation. “And because you shot down my initial demon idea, Castiel informed me Dean was once a vampire. I’m very impressed you were able to cure him, by the way, I’ve never heard of one being able to take the sire-”

“All right, all right, no need to rehash _that_. So let me get this straight, because Dean was a vampire once, you’re gonna play Edward and Bela?” Sam tried, with all his might, to state it with an _even tone_. It was all _too_ ridiculous, even for them.

“As I said, you were the one who suggested it,” Cas reiterated.

Hannah spoke proudly, “I will play the role of Jacob.”

“Excuse me?!” The human spat, it wasn’t even a question, it was more of a squeal.

“We’re working two motifs into one scenario. The theme of the supernatural, and the ever-present love-triangle, and threat of jealousy,” Hannah explained, “Although... I’m still brainstorming about how to join the werewolves. I’m not sure how they will respond to an angel. That is current obstacle as well.”

“Yeah. You keep working on that,” Sam caught Dean exiting the building, “Noticed you getting handsy with Cas earlier, _Dean_ did too.”

“What was his response?” Cas urged quickly, as the man approached the car.

“Called Hannah a harlot,” Sam cackled, as the car door opened.

“A-?!” The woman gaped.

And spent the rest of the time glaring at the back of Dean’s head. She was just going to have to kick it up a notch. After all, it was all for Castiel’s ‘mission.’


	3. Miscalculations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _“She’s sure picked up on humanity nicely,” Dean commented through grit teeth, “She your girlfriend now, or something? Is that where you’ve been hopping off too? Cute. Angelic. Dates.”_
> 
> _“Well, yes, I do see Hannah in Heaven, but we’re not dating,” Cas laughed, like it was obvious. “She’s never gotten an invitation to the pants party, if that’s what you’re suggesting.”_
> 
> _“The what?”_
> 
> _“The... Party in my pants?”_
> 
> _“Did you just quote, a misquote, from Anchorman?”_
> 
> _“There’s a very good possibility I did.”_

_Twilight_ , Sam repeated over and over in his head, _Out of any stupid thing that came out of my mouth, why did the thing Cas picked up on be Twilight._

There was no telling how this was going to play out, but if there was one thing Sam gave Cas and Hannah kudos for, it was after a lingering stare between angels when Hannah herself needed to ‘return to Heaven’ that the jealousy thing was working on Dean. And it was working well.

He froze when it looked like Hannah was _actually_ going to lean in to kiss Castiel goodbye, but instead, picked a fallen leaf from his shirt. She smiled, and then vanished.

“She’s sure picked up on humanity nicely,” Dean commented through grit teeth, “She your girlfriend now, or something? Is that where you’ve been hopping off too? Cute. Angelic. Dates.”

“Well, yes, I do see Hannah in Heaven, but we’re not dating,” Cas laughed, like it was obvious. “She’s never gotten an invitation to the pants party, if that’s what you’re suggesting.”

“The _what_?”

“The... Party in my pants?”

“Did you just quote, a misquote, from Anchorman?”

“There’s a very good possibility I did.”

“All right, Brick, let’s get on with narrowing down these evil lairs,” Dean slung an arm around Castiel’s shoulders, almost like he was reclaiming a possession.

Speaking of Anchorman, Dean wasn’t going to tell Cas he was a half second away from telling Hannah, “You are a smelly pirate hooker. Why don’t you go back to your home on Whore Island?" Nah, that would be rude. Even if he _felt_ it. He was starting to like this game, even if he only played along in his head.

Sam smirked from behind, because it read ‘mine’ all over, from where he was. Plus, he was more than likely making a show of it for Hannah, if she decided to pop back in. Dean was so _transparent_ , it was a joke. If Sam could just whisper, “ _Destiel_ ,” one more time in his ear, or sneak it into a cough, and they could just fall in love, that’d be ideal. But since they’d been having dream-sex, weren’t they already together?

This was a cluster-fuck of complicated.

\---------

When their leads didn’t pan out, they were back to the hotel room, researching away. It was then, that Sam put forward his first piece of advise and _ordered_ Cas to stay. He was doing himself no favors by ‘returning to Heaven,’ and Dean was in a much better mood when the angel was around. Dean didn’t even complain when he was looking though maps of the town, and x-ing out the locations they checked, and circling the ones they planned on heading to the next day. They would only have a good hour left of sunlight on their side and they didn't plan on facing down either of these groups in the dark tonight.

Everything was fine and dandy, until Cas ‘thought he heard something’ and opened the curtain in the hotel room.

As soon as Dean _yelped_ , the good mood was over.

“What the _fuck_!”

Sam and Cas spun around to the alarmed sound coming from the table, where Dean’s face paled in mortification and he stuttered out, “I-I’m fucking _sparkling_.” His eyes were terrified as they flew between the two other men and he demanded, “ _Why_ am I _sparkling_?!”

Sam’s hand clamped down on his mouth to keep from laughing.

“I look like I _fucked Kesha last night!_ ”

Cas nearly corrected him, ‘ _No_ , actually _I_ fucked you,’ but settled on, “We are who we are.”

“No, no, no,” Dean stood up and charged towards the angel, “You are _not_ Kesha’ing me! You _will_ tell me why I’m _shining_ like a stripper and _fix it now!_ ”

“I-I-” Cas stammered, having a hard time keeping his hands (and _mouth_ , for that matter) to himself, as Dean was practically nose-to-nose with him.

“Witches?” Sam piped up from behind. “If we’ve already got vamps and weres fighting over territory, this could be a witch thing.”

Dean did not break his stare with Cas, but it softened... a bit. Even if he could still see his skin glowing from the corner of his eye. “You could be right,” his eyes flickered down to Cas’ lips before me stepped away, “But why _me_?!”

Cas drew in a deep breath and decided right then and there, _yes_ , Sam was a _very_ good ‘wingman,’ since he had been too lost in the moment to come up with a good explanation. He was two seconds away from throwing caution to the wind and start singing Rhianna's 'Diamond,' and kissing the man breathless in the glorious glow emanating from Dean, if he were totally honest.  He'd never almost lost control like that before. But then he also wanted to smack himself, because Sam agreed Dean  _does not_ respond well to pop stars (especially of the female variety) even if Castiel, himself, have picked up a strange affinity to them.

“Who knows,” Sam was throwing the blinds closed, while he tried to calm his brother down, “It could be a supernatural battle ground?”

“So this is The fuckin’ Vampire Diaries on crack, or something?”

Once again, Cas wanted to correct that, no, there _weren’t_ witches and _this was a metaphor for_ _Twilight_ , but stopped by saying, “No, in The Vampire Diaries they are _comrades_ more than--”

“ _Cas_!” Both men snapped, but Dean seemed to be more complacent now that he wasn’t shining in the sunlight.

“All right,” Dean took a deep breath in, “I’m beginning to smell _Trickster_ written all over this.”

Suddenly, all Cas’ thoughts slammed to a halt. That was actually quite... _brilliant_. What if he and Hannah could take out the _real threat_ of the vampire nest and the werewolf populatation and attempt to contact a Trickster to assist them? It would completely save them the threat of casualties and aid his cause. This is something a Trickster may be interesting in partaking in, especially one who had been dormant and living among humans, as he knew they were prone to these days. They indulged in pranks to get their 'just desserts,' rather than murders these days with the threat of hunters. This would be an exciting endeavor for one.

“I must return to Heaven!”

And Cas was gone.

Sam threw his hands up, “You have _got_ to be fucking _kidding_ me!”

Dean raised an eyebrow at how upset his brother seemed at the angel’s disappearance. _That_ was something new. Instead, Dean just felt that knot in his stomach tighten, because he _knew_ Cas hanging around was too good to be true. He should have known he was going to poof away and ditch them sooner or later. He had just been hoping it was later than this...

\---------

“Change of plans,” Castiel popped up, while Hannah was walking through the woods, on her way to handle the werewolf situation. “We must summon a Trickster.”

She stopped dead in her tracks and turned around slowly, “I thought _this_ plan was going well. Why would we abandon it now?”

“The plan _is_ going well,” he confirmed with a nod, “But we could insure it to be fool-proof if we convinced a Trickster to assist us in the process. Their power could make it appear to be more like our goal, and we wouldn’t have to pull strings, or account for the way the two tribes acted. Don’t you think it’s a good plan? We may continue to the werewolf house, if you like. I’m fairly confident we’ll be able to summon one and convince them to join our mission, so we can go ahead and take care of this pack now so your trip won’t be in vain.”

Hannah didn’t make a move to walk again, “Are you _sure_ of this, Castiel? Summoning one, and being confident they would assist? I think it may be wiser to account for the unknown in the two tribes, rather than a wild-card. It’s a gamble.”

“Dean has suspicious.” He stated firmly, “And I didn’t even _think_ to blame the mischievous on someone like that before. It’s _perfect_. I have to believe we can pull this off.”

She continued to think about the possibility, then cautiously returned, “It _would_ be easier to deal with one than dozens. ..”

“Exactly.”

“So we shall play the part of hunters, for now?”

“Yes, and summon the Trickster later.”

“Very well,” she nodded and pulled on her game face, while she allowed her angel blade to slip into her grasp.

Maybe she could work out some of the confusion and frustration on these factions.

\-----------

They had recently agreed that Hannah and Cas would get a separate room, which Sam had the key-card to, while they were still putting Cas’ plan into action. They _needed_ to meet at the end of the day and discuss what went wrong and what went ...wrong- _er_.

It was a good idea, since Sam had _more_ than a list of issues to bring up.

Until it _wasn't_ a good idea anymore.

“What’s this?” Dean asked, flipping the key-card between his fingers and staring his brother down with suspicion, “Room 418, huh? At the hotel _next door_? I _know_ this isn’t for a lady, even though that hotel is much nicer than this shitty-beach-on-acid themed motel. But even so, we _never_ get a room that isn’t on the first floor. Wanna explain this, Sammy?”

He paused, a million thoughts running through his mind. How much could he give away? How much would his brother be able to take? Was this a golden opportunity, or a bridge to burn? Sam had to chose his words carefully, as he plucked the key-card out of Dean’s hands, and tried to act casual.

“Since this might be a motherload of a case, Cas wanted to be close.” Sam shrugged. “You know. Vampires, werewolves, witches. Possible Trickster. So he got a room. And there were no vacancies here.”

AKA they wanted to be as far away from them as possible, so Dean didn’t find out. But close enough Sam could visit.

“Why didn’t he just stay with us? Not like we couldn’t have gotten a cot or--” his eyes widened at a realization, “Hannah.”

“Yeah. She wanted to help out too. But they didn’t want to crowd us. Four people is a lot in one motel room, dude.”

“Yeah.”

Dean was strangely silent, and crossed his arms, “Why do _you_ have the key? Weren’t planning on telling me?”

“It’s for both of us. I just didn’t want to mention it, because you were going to get all jealous _just like_ you’re getting _now_. There’s nothing going on between them, dude. They got two beds. Why are you acting like a scorned lover, anyway?” Sam meant it to tease, but also to get a reaction out of him.

“I don’t like her.” He shrugged his shoulders and turned away to grab his duffle bag, “She’s not good enough for Cas, is all. Plus, remember how she _tried to kill me_? Anyway, I’m taking a shower.”

He grumbled something under his breath before he disappeared into the bathroom. Sam didn’t know whether or not to count that as a win or not, but he was thankful he didn’t accidentally spill, or say something to blow Cas’ cover.

. .Why was Dean going through his coat pockets, anyway?

\--------

It was a gamble, going into room 418 that night, after Dean had fallen asleep. However, not only did he have to yell at Cas for disappearing, he also had to warn Hannah and Cas that Dean was getting extremely suspicious about their relationship. Whether they liked it or not, the jealousy thing was working, but he didn’t know how much they should push it, because Dean was getting downright _pissed_.

When he entered the room, he didn’t expect the two angels to be covered in blood, healing wounds, and Cas attempting to get a stain out of his jacket the old-fashioned way.

“What the _hell_ happened to you guys?”

“Change of plans,” Cas scrubbed at the red blotches, “We took care of the vampire nest. The wolves were nothing to worry about, they had already handled one of their own who had decided to go renegade. It was an easy job, and now you and Dean won’t have to worry about the actual vampires.”

“ _Actual_?” Sam echoed, “I don’t like the sound of that. If this is going to be anything like your previous angel-slash-actor-fail, I don’t think-”

“Once we’re fully recovered, we’ll be summoning a Trickster,” Hannah stated, opting to mojo her blood-stains clean instead, “It will be safer, and I heard Dean already has suspicions-”

“There is _nothing_ safe about a damn _Trickster_!” Sam stated, and emphasized his hate of the idea by slamming his hand down on the table, “You’re playing with fire!”

“The Trickster you dealt with wasn’t the normal type, if you remember correctly,” Cas rolled his eyes, “ _Obviously_ he was _much_ more powerful and wasn’t bound by the rules of-”

Sam waited for Cas to continue, but the angel looked distracted, until the man prompted, “Rules of...?”

“Dean’s _summoning_ me.”

“Oh, shit,” Sam wiped a hand across his face, “Please tell me this isn't for your _nightly dream-sexcapades_.”

“Yes, it very well might be,” Cas answered simply with a nod, “I’ll be back.”

He vanished, and Hannah shrugged.

“I _can’t_ go back. Not _knowing_ they’re _boning_ in my brother’s head, _oh my god_ , I can’t believe those words just came out of my mouth,” Sam covered his eyes with his palms, “My life is turning into a nightmare.”

“You’re welcome to stay here. I’ll watch over you until they’re finished, then wake you,” Hannah suggested.

“Please. _Never_ say ’I’ll watch over you.’ Is that an angel thing? How did I get myself so far into this mess.” Sam collapsed to one of the beds. “Maybe summoning a Trickster isn’t a bad idea. I’ll be spared this time, because I’ve already received _more_ than my ‘just desserts.’ They wouldn't be able to _touch me._ ”

“You’ve dealt with Tricksters in the past?” Hannah shifted her body, looking very interested. “I’ve never encountered one.”

“It’s a long, and pain-in-the-ass of a story. _Trust me_ , Hannah. You _never_ want to encounter the ‘ _Trickster_ ’ I encountered.”

As much as she wanted to, Hannah didn’t press further. She had come to find out, that the Winchesters talked about a lot of things. So if there was a topic they didn’t want to discuss, it must have been taboo. Or at least, something they referred to as a ‘chick flick’ moment, or something terribly embarrassing. She guessed it was the latter.

\-------

Castiel was in fight or flight mode, because he had miscalculated and jumped at the chance to be with Dean too quickly.

_Much too quickly._

Because now, he was pinned to the bed, the man growling in his ear that ‘Cas belonged to him, and Hannah could go fuck herself,’ in-between kisses, and didn't hesitate to thrust against him but _something_ had gone _terribly_ array. Even though _Dean_ thought he was in a _dream_...

... He was _most definitely awake._

Yet, he was still kissing the hell out of Cas and holding him down like he didn’t know the difference.

Because he _didn't_.

Castiel had basically pounced on him _too_ soon, right _as_ Dean was falling asleep, but instead of _joining_ him in his subconscious, he'd  _woke him up_ from his dream. Dean was too groggy and mistook the grogginess for the dream-like haze they’d been in lately.

And now Cas was _panicking_.

He tried not to show it, and conjured the same dream-like fog into the room as he arched into Dean’s touch while he moaned into his mouth, “Yes, I’m all yours.”

Dean went to work on ripping off Cas’ button down, which he’d thankfully removed the blood from, and kissed down his chest, biting and sucking all the way. He was leaving his mark, leaving his _claim_ , and reducing the angel to whimpers. This was all so _different_. The actual, _physical_ feel of Dean against his skin as he worked at unbuttoning his pants. He could feel the chilly air in the room as his fly was unzipped and Dean took him into his hand.

He knitted his fingers through Dean's hair, as he licked the entire length of his cock before swallowing him down. The feeling was unlike _anything_ he‘d experienced before, and the man above him wasted no time bobbing his head up and down before pulling off. Dean lewdly swirled his tongue around the tip, staring right into Cas’ eyes before asking, “Think you can fuck my face, Cas?”

Cas nodded hastily, renewing his grip on Dean’s hair before the man opened his throat and-

\- _that’s_ when everything went to hell.

And the smoke alarms started going off.

Because of the _damn mist_ Cas had filled the room with.

“What the-?” Dean pulled off him and looked around, startled.

Panic, _panic_ was filling Cas’ chest, and he did the first thing that made sense.

He got rid of the fire alarms with one swift sweep of his arm.

However, he put _too much_ mojo behind it, in his terror, and got rid of the _whole_ damn _ceiling_ of the motel. There was screaming coming from next door, a dog barking three doors down, and children shrieking at the end of the hall. _Dean_ couldn’t pick up yet, but Castiel’s angelic hearing _did_ , so he _immediately_ cut out all the sound and placed them in a sound-proof bubble.

His mind was on repeat: _I can save this, I can save this, I can save this._

Dean was confused, _very confused,_ so Cas lifted him and slammed him on his back, to whisper into his ear, while tilting his chin up, “Look at the stars. Look how they shine for you.”

The human was raising an eyebrow staring right at the angel rather than the sky, but in his head, couldn’t explain any of this shit other than _this was a dream_ and Cas was being _cheesy_ as fuck, “I’m gonna let that one slide, as long as you-”

He was cut off by Cas spreading his legs, suddenly naked, and the angel licking between his thighs. Cas'd come to find out there was no better way to distract Dean and take him apart better than a good old-fashioned rim job. And _thank god,_ he had obtained this knowledge. Dean moaned into the touch, as Cas lifted him up, just enough to gain access to his entrance and teased with the tip of his tongue. To make sure he was _thoroughly_ distracted, and didn’t analyze _anything_ that just happened, he spit on his palm and wrapped his hand around Dean’s cock.

Castiel lapped around his opening, until Dean relaxed enough to slide his tongue inside. He was sloppy, he made sure to get Dean nice and wet before he even tried to use his fingers. This was _new_ territory, after all. Castiel fucked him with his tongue, in time with his fist until Dean begged him for more. To which he _gladly_ gave.  
  
“Oh, god, _Cas_ ,” Dean writhed around, as the angel soothed one finger after the other inside the man’s body.

He was quick to find his prostate, and relentlessly pound against it once he heard Dean’s breathless pleas. He didn’t want this to end quickly, but it _needed_ to. In the throws of passion, Dean _lost himself_ , he wasn’t going to be able to question all the things that were going terribly wrong and figure out that this _wasn’t_ a dream. Cas couldn’t risk him finding out, _not now,_ not now that they had a _plan_ , and a _chance_.

As soon as he wriggled in a fourth finger, he kissed Dean’s inner thigh and sucked (something he had come to find _as well_ , drove the man crazy.) Not that he needed to. He was currently begging, aloud, to be fucked, and Cas was more than ready. He was hard, and dripping precum, hungry and desperate to dive inside Dean’s perfect body, for _real_ , for the _first_ time. He hoped this went as smoothly as it went in the man’s dreams, so he used a little bit of his angelic powers to ease Dean, and make his cock as slick as possible as he crawled back up his body and lined up.

He didn’t know if what he was doing was wrong?

But he didn’t have a chance to think about it, when Dean’s legs wrapped around his hips and dragged him forward. Cas exhaled, a moan of pleasure as the head of his cock was pushed in, and then he took the initiative to slide in the rest of the way. With their bodies linked, Dean nudged Cas’ cheek with his forehead until they were looking each other in the eyes.

“ _This_ ,” he rolled his hips, “Is _mine_.” He kissed him hard, and pulled away, “No one else’s. You wanna know why?”

Dean didn’t stop grinding against Cas, working him inside, deeper than the man thought _possible_. He was breathless, but, once he remembered he had been asked a question, actually managed to find the word, “Why?”

“Because _I love you_ , idiot.”

Cas’ eyes widened, because Dean was serious. His eyes were set, laser-focused, and filled with lust. And _love_. The angel couldn’t hold back anymore. His heart was beating out of his chest, as he pulled out enough to thrust hard into Dean, and didn’t let up.

He also couldn’t stop kissing him, and Dean had _no_ complaints. It would have looked rough and sloppy, but it was driven by passion, and the fact that they couldn’t _get close enough_ to each other. It was heated, feverous, and desperate. If Cas was relentless with his fingers when he found Dean’s sweet spot, it was a shallow example of how he pushed Dean closer and closer to orgasm with his cock. He knew the man was losing it, the teeth and tongues became more clumsy and Dean could no longer form words, just noises and demands that resembled words.

And Cas... Cas was _more_ than a _little_ overwhelmed. The tightness, the actual feel and slide of Dean’s body was _beyond_ perfect, he couldn’t believe he’d last this long. His mission, above all, was to make Dean cum first. It was a mission he took _very_ seriously. That was the singularly reason he hadn’t already blown his load inside him, and by the looks and the delicious sounds Dean was creating, it wouldn’t be long now.

“Fuck,” Dean wrapped his legs around Cas in a vice-like grip, and spilled all over the two of them.

Cas was thankful, having been riding on the brink for so long, and nipped Dean’s neck, confessing, “I love you, too,” as he came, harder than he’d ever before, and blew out all the light bulbs in the room.

When they both came floated down from the afterglow, Cas found Dean laying on his chest, watching him with a smug smile. He kissed him once, before collapsing to his side, with his arms still wrapped around the angels and casually commented, “The stars _are_ pretty nice. And fuckin’ fairy land.”

“Mm,” Cas nodded, and hugged Dean tighter.

His hand naturally found Dean’s forehead, and after mojo-ing them clean, started running his fingers through his hair. He wished he could stay like this forever. The warmth of the man’s body curled against him, the tender touches and, _really_? Dean had said _he loved him?_

Cas’ heart had felt like it was going to _explode_ with joy.

He kissed Dean’s forehead and relaxed back in bed, savoring the moment, as he listened to Dean’s breathing slowly relax, and knew he was falling asleep. This time, for _real_. Maybe this _had_ been salvaged? Maybe his quick-thinking had been enough. Oh, he _prayed_ it had been. Or else, he had no idea what he was going to do.

\--------

“Castiel!”

Hannah’s angry voice was the first thing he heard.

Why was she angry?

But, first of all, _why_ was he hearing it out of _nowhere_?

He was groggy, he sat up from the bed and looked around. He was back in their hotel room, looking at the distressed angel, and tilting his head to the side. But that’s when he realized what was wrong.

He had just _woken up_.

“Oh no,” he felt his face pale, and he looked at the other angel with pleading eyes, “Hannah, what happened. I fell asleep, I wasn’t _supposed_ to fall asleep, I wasn’t supposed to--”

“ _Tear_ the roof off an _entire_ motel building? Have sex with Dean Winchester and have his brother _walk in_ on the two of you snoozing away completely _naked_ right before the fire department and cops got there?” She was trying to take in deep breaths and let them out slowly. “It’s all right. We handled the situation. I made sure Dean didn’t wake up, then Sam and I moved all their things and _Dean_ to another location. _What were you thinking_ , Castiel?”

“I wasn’t _thinking_ , I was just _doing_!” He defended, mildly mortified at what happened that night, “But... He said he loved me. And I believe the jealousy route is the perfect way to win his heart. We stumbled upon a wonderful idea, Hannah. We must continue with this course.”

She blinked.

“So. After all of the chaos that was just caused. The _only thing_ you have to say about it was ‘we’re on the right track?’”

Cas looked offended, but shrugged his shoulders, “He said he _loved_ me. I believe that’s answer enough. We shall summon our Trickster tonight.”

Hannah couldn’t believe it, she was about to have a _human-sized temper tantrum._ After all Sam and her went through to pick up the pieces and clean up the mess, Cas’ response was, ‘we’re doing good, let’s head the Trickster route?’ He had no idea. None. She was two seconds away from pulling her hair out, but the goofy grin on her superior’s face had her stopping her tirade.

Hopefully, Dean’s brother had the same soft spot for Cas that she did.

\--------

Dean stretched as he woke up and rolled over to look at the clock on the bedside, when he looked up to his brother, who looked like he hadn’t gotten a lick of sleep and commented, “ _Dude_ , it’s passed 11, why didn’t you wake me?”

His only answer was a grunt, from behind the laptop.

“Well. Uh, thanks? I guess I needed it.”

Dean stretched out, and frowned as he felt himself a little sore. They hadn’t worked a really physical case in a few days, so _that_ was strange in and of itself. Plus, Cas had been healing them regular so none of the fatigue was ever lasting fatigue. Sometimes, he tossed and turned from nightmares and threw his back out of place? So that must have been it.

Only... He had a really good dream last night.

Really. Really. Really. Good dream.

A dopey smile came to his face as he stared at the ceiling and hoped his brother didn’t notice. He knew Sam was going to give him shit about it, so he tried to keep it to himself. Yeah, that was something private he didn’t plan on sharing any time soon, thank you very much.

However, after he stared at the ceiling, he noticed something.

The giant water stain from the day before was gone.

It was just tacky beige. He only _remembered_ the giant water stain, because he’d spent a good amount of time _glaring_ at it the night before. Weird.

He frowned and looked around the room. It was still beach-chic-shitty but it was... _Off_.

Everything was still ugly shades of sand, seashells and faux-rolling surf but the tacky hula lamp? Gone. The Hawaiian flowers Dean had found and chucked over the heater? Gone. Hell, the layout was the same, but the sheets weren’t the same kind of _itchy_ as the last ones.

“Uhh...” Dean started, staring at his brother until the man looked at him, “Which hotel are we at?”

“The Seaside Motel?” Sam asked, with a bored expression, “Why?”

“I thought it was the _Oceanview_.” Dean raised an eyebrow.

“No, Dean.” Sam was a combination of exasperated and exhausted, “It’s _always_ been the Seaside. I think getting too much sleep is doing things to your brain.”

That shut him up.

But he couldn’t help this strange, niggling feeling in the back of his head.

He could have _sworn_ they’d checked into the Oceanview. Maybe he _had_ gotten too much sleep, that was the strangest thing to have happened in a while.

\--------

By the time the night rolled around, Sam had gotten over any harsh feelings towards Cas, because he’d convinced Dean that there wasn’t anything to worry about. Besides, once again, as much as he hated to admit it, his brother was in a damn good mood, and it was hard to stay mad when he’d hustled his ass to help create that. It was worth it. When he went out to ‘grab takeout’ he was actually meeting up with he angels to help out in this Trickster summoning he had a terrible gut feeling about.

Cas also thanked him, upon his arrival, and explained they already had all the ingredients prepared, and, if need be, a binding spell.

“You can bind Tricksters?” Sam raised an eyebrow, “I didn’t know that was a thing.”

“Well, it’s not as though it’s a common spell, since it’s not a common necessity. If you’re offering a Trickster mischief, they very rarely deny it.” Hannah explains, her eyes scanning over the spell work for the summoning. “It’s just a precaution.”

“Especially since you went ahead and killed all the vamps and dealt with the werewolves, right? You need some kind of case, if you keep Dean sparkling,” Sam scoffed, and shuffled his feet, “It’ll be interesting to meet an _actual_ Trickster.”

“That, it will,” Castiel was busy drawing sigils on the ground, while Hannah dropped spell components into the bowl.

There was a puff of smoke from Hannah’s work, but before she could even begin chanting, or Cas could finish the ground work, the electricity crackled in the room, and footsteps echoed, _without_ a _body_. As the footfalls became louder and louder, as though the figure should be _directly_ upon them, a booming, yet mischievous voice finally perked up.

“Aw, Cassie, long time no see. Who’s this _lovely_ she-angel you’re keeping company these days?”

“You _know_ them?” Hannah looked confused between the men, who were immobile by the sight in front of them. “Castiel? Sam?”

“Hannah. Remember when I said you never wanted to encounter the ‘Trickster’ I encountered?” Sam didn’t know whether to gulp or glare, so he was almost sure he looked more or less constipated. “This is my long, pain-in-the-ass of a story.”

“Sammy, Sammy, Sammy, I’m hurt,” the ‘Trickster’ walked forward even further and patted the taller man on the cheek before waggling his eyebrows, “Although I can’t deny our times together sometimes happened to be a _pain_ in your _ass_. But you forgot to add ‘ _hard_ ’ to that ‘ _long_ ,’ babe.”

“Gabriel,” Castiel nodded, and ignored the way Sam went red, all the way to the tips of his ears. “You’re alive. I’m not surprised.”

“ _Obviously_. So. You wanted a Trickster? This is new.”

Suddenly, this turned into a nightmare of an idea.


	4. Vampires Don't Sparkle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _The way Sam had reacted to Gabriel confused Hannah, and only a few of the things she had come across in her research online made sense in a situation like this._
> 
> _If she recalled correctly, she believed they were an example of, “supporting characters” who offered “comedic relief” and had romantic story lines of their own. In addition, what Gabriel had described, and Sam’s behavior also indicated there was a serious case of “sexual tension.”_
> 
> _Interesting. She was beginning to understand and recognize these things, all on her own._
> 
> _She pulled out her note pad and wrote it down before she forgot, so she could bring it to Castiel’s attention later. Little did she know that Gabriel was leaning over her shoulder, until he was lightly tapping on the top of her head, and correcting, “Sidesplitting Comedic Relief, and Delicious Sexual Tension. Duh.”_
> 
> _As caught off guard and embarrassed as Hannah was, she quickly scribbled out the notes she made, and changed them to what the archangel had instructed._
> 
> _“Much better.”_

“So! Tell me a story, kiddos!” Gabriel kicked back in one of the hotel chairs and rubbed his hands together excitedly, “Don’t glare at me, Sammy. I know you excepted a real Trickster, but I couldn’t resist popping in as soon as you started the spell. Didn’t want just _any_ Trickster here, right? So I made the choice for ya. Thought you’d be more excited to see me,” he finished with a wink.

“Why the hell-”

“Archangel Gabriel?!” Hannah demanded, while she knelt before him, effectively cutting the younger Winchester off abruptly, “How are you still alive? It’s an honor to meet-”

Sam grabbed Hannah and pulled her from the floor, “Trust me, he’s nothing to bow to.”

“You wound me,” he pouted, “Yes, archangel, former Trickster, Loki, blah blah blah, I’m here because you called, so, for once, we can cut the formalities and jump right in?”

Castiel and Sam had a million questions. Where had be been hiding? Why _now_ did he decide to show his face? Was he affected by the fall? Why didn’t he give help in the face of Metatron? But the smirk on the man’s face was answer enough. Answer, that they weren’t going to get answers, and he didn’t give a shit about anything the angels were going through. He was only interested in himself, just as he’d been before, and none of their issues were any concern of his. Until now. More than likely, because it was going to be ‘fun.’

That lit an angry fire inside Sam, and he was two seconds away from heading out the door, when Cas grabbed his arm and shook his head. He knew exactly what the man was thinking, and voiced it, “Sam, I need you here to speak with Gabriel or I’m afraid I won’t be able to convey it properly. Please, stay.”

“Yes,” Gabriel leaned forward, pouting at him, “Please, do stay. I missed that handsome face.”

Sam clenched his fists at the same time he steeled his jaw, “Well, tell him, Cas.”

The explanation was surprisingly long-winded, thorough, and Castiel didn’t leave out a single detail. Equally shocking, was for how long it took, Gabriel didn’t interrupt him _once_. Just raised an eyebrow, nodded his head from time to time and paid attention. Which was very un-Gabriel-like. Sam was expecting him to be annoying, to cut him off, to call him stupid and berate him for all the idiotic plans he’d tried thus far. Let alone pulling what he’d done last night. But no, Gabriel was being... Well-behaved?

Which pissed Sam off even more. The man had played dead, disappeared for years, and now just for _fun_ he had shown up to possibly help with Dean and Cas’ love life, which was going to end up fine in the end anyway? Why show his face _now_? Sam thought Cas wanted him here to back him up, but Cas was doing a damn fine job all by himself, and didn’t need help. Which made Sam want to leave all over again. Pronto. He had food to pick up before Dean got suspicious, he had to make sure his brother wasn’t asking questions, and that-

“Sam?”

Three pairs of eyes were on him, when he finally broke out of his trance, “Uh, what?”

“I’m going to get Gabriel a copy of the Twilight Saga.” Castiel announced with a smile.

“ _Wait_ , you’re actually going to _help_?” Sam asked suspiciously.

“This is gonna be the most fun I’ve had in ages, are you kidding?!” Gabriel laughed and stood up, “Hannah, I require a surplus of rock candy and snickers for this while I plan. Be a doll?”

Hannah flushed and bowed her head, as she zapped off as well, leaving the two alone in the hotel room together.

“I gotta go, Dean’s waiting for-” Sam turned his back, before the angel grabbed his shoulder and spun him around.

“For this?” He was grinning and proudly holding the Thai takeout in his hand. “C’mon, you have no reason _not_ to talk to me, ok.”

“There’s nothing to talk _about_.” Sam made a move to snatch the bag from his hand, which Gabriel easily dodged. “Just give me,” he reached again, “the damn,” one more time, “food!” Before shooting him the most intense bitch face he could muster.

“Woah, woah, no need to pull out the big guns,” Gabriel set the food down on the table then dared to take a step closer. “You’re fussy because you missed me.”

If possible, Sam’s glare deepened, “I didn’t miss you. And I’m not fussy. I just need to get back to my brother.”

“I know when you’re lying, Sam Winchester,” his grin widened as he ran a hand through Sam’s hair and drew him closer, his presence engulfing the man even if his stature was much shorter, “And you’re lying. Right. Now.”

“I’ve acquired the movie!” Castiel announced, and then paused, “Oh. Did I interrupt something?”

He caught them both off guard enough to where Sam could grab the take out, and easily escape the room. Gabriel huffed and turned towards his brother.

“Annnnd one more rule. If I’m gonna help, no cockblocking me, all right? I have no problem in matters of seduction, unless awkward seraphs keep popping in at the worst times,” Gabriel snatched the DVDs out of Castiel’s hands and sighed deeply, “He always turns the fuckin’ _cutest_ shade of red when he’s embarrassed.”

“Wait. Have you and Sam...?” Cas raised an eyebrow, and followed Gabriel closely as he popped the first DVD in the TV.

“A gentleman never tells,” is his simple response, even though it’s overshadowed by a wicked grin as he clicks through the menu, “All right, let’s check out this bullshit teeny bopper romance the moose suggested.”

\---------

Dean was hungry, as he waited for Sam to bring back the food. And when Dean was hungry, he started getting restless. He had done enough research on too many things, considering that he’d already faced down witches, vampires, werewolves _and_ Tricksters in the past, there was literally no reason, and no new evolutionary change that made him need to bleed his brain and research them _more_.

_But_ there was still something driving him insane, in the back of his mind. It was tugging, bothering him, and there was one way to find out.

He crossed the room, and took a seat at Sam’s computer, opening up a new browser without feeling guilty. It’s not like Google was going to crash his computer, it wasn’t porn or anything today. His fingers flew across the keyboard, typing in ‘Oceanview Motel,’ and sure enough, that motel _did_ exist. The first link that popped up was for the establishment, which had a familiar looking address and a familiar looking _everything_. Especially when he clicked into Google images.

He scrolled down the page and was _convinced_ he had stayed there before. But maybe all the hunts, and all the bad motel rooms had blurred together? The cheaper they were (especially when they got desperate and went to the ‘pay by the hour’ kind) the more ridiculous the themes became, and this _could_ be another example of that. Sam was probably right. He didn’t want to over think it. Maybe it was a chain on this coast.

Yeah. He’d go with that.

Because, why the hell would they be in this hotel today?

He clicked the back button, and nearly exited the browser until a headline in the ‘news’ section caught his eyes. His heart was suddenly in his throat.

_Freak Accident at Oceanview Motel_

It was dated this morning.

Dean hesitated before he scrolled the mouse to barely hover over the link. Did he want to see what happened when he clicked this? He had a terrible feeling as to what he was going to find. Which was why he couldn’t just ignore it. He clicked it anyway.

If his heart was in his throat before, it was now ping-ponging through his entire digestive track and tearing him to pieces. He couldn’t read all of it, but he didn’t _need_ to. The parts he glimpsed at were enough.

_-entire roof ripped from motel-_

_-no trace of rubble or scraps near site-_

_-no causalities or injuries-_

_-only warning, was a smoke alarm in a guest’s room-_

_-strange lingering fog persists after accident throughout motel-_

Dean just stared. Then, he calmly exited the search results. He shut the laptop down and stood up until he fell down face down on the bed. He gripped the pillow by either edge and made sure his face was securely buried against the cheap cotton casing.

And proceeded to scream his lungs out.

\------------

Something was off with Dean when Sam got back.

However, that was the same time Dean realized something was off with Sam as well.

Neither of them asked questions.

This was no time for chick flick moments, as they stewed in their own internal crisis, and let the internal pressure, conflict and general freak-outs build. The room was silent until Sam cleared his throat, and for the first time in a full hour of _nothing_ asked.

“So. Uh. Should we check out the nests?” Even though _he_ knew they were no longer populated, and a man he’d assumed dead and was pissed off at because he was alive but would have been more upset if he was still dead, who was now ‘reanimating them…’ he lost that entire train of thought.

Moral of the story, they _needed_ to get out of the hotel. The tension was building, something was bothering Dean, Sam himself was about to have a meltdown, and if Gabriel had constructed something for them to kill, maybe that would be for the best. Anyway to work off this steam.

“Yeah. Let’s do that.”

“Uh. Cool.”

Great. Castiel’s awkward had worn off on the whole damn team.

\------------

The boys were off to do more reconnaissance as Gabe tinkered with spell work. He finally watched through as much Twilight as he could without throwing up, and putting together a situation and illusions of wolves and vampires that met the profile was easy enough. Hannah kept looking over at him while he’d hum to himself, write something down, and seemed as though he was genuinely excited about the prospect of getting this show started. Which was _most peculiar_ to her. She was ecstatic to be in the presences of an archangel, and was beaming to help him, but aside for a few logistical questions about what had happened thus far, she wasn’t able to be of much assistance.

Which made her start to think. Normally, in Heaven, or in any other situation she would never had dared to question anything a superior of such status was doing, but the casual way the Winchesters treated him, and the friendship, rather than subordination Castiel showed, made her feel brave.

“Gabriel?” She found herself inquiring, before she could stop.

The man in question turned around with a quirked eyebrow, “What’s up?”

“I don’t know if it’s my place to ask, but I genuinely would like to understand. You were one of the first four in all of God’s creation, and I’ve always been led to believe that a human and an angel being romantically involved was blasphemy. I’ve learned a lot from my time alongside Castiel here on Earth, and I believe his case is _special_ , but what makes you so eager to assist?” She chose her words carefully, being respectful, but getting her point across. “Knowing those words came from the Father Himself, and hearing Him speak them, I’d expect an archangel would be the last to help, and consider it blasphemy.”

“Hah,” Gabriel threw his head back and laughed, “I’ve walked among the humans a lot longer than any of them combined, sister. Been aware, supported, hell, participated in things much, much more _blasphemous_ , let me tell ya. But you said it yourself. These muttonheads are a special case.”

She quirked a smile of her own, “All _three_ of them, am I correct?”

“Why, Hannah!” The archangel faked a gasp and placed a hand over his heart, “Is this you subtly asking me about my relationship with Samuel?”

“That’s probable.”

“Well. I commend ya on your _finesse_ , something Cassie still has yet to grasp.” Gabriel turned his back to her, and directed his attention to the piece of paper he was scribbling symbols on, “He’s a good kid. Spent a lot of time with him. He’s got a place in my heart,” he looked over his shoulder and winked, “He just hates me right now, because of how much he loves me. Soon, he’ll remember and come around.”

Hannah tilted her head in thought. She wasn’t sure if it was his bravado, or the truth disguised in jest. But the way Sam had reacted to him confused her, and only a few of the things she had come across in her research online made sense in a situation like this.

If she recalled correctly, she believed they were an example of, “supporting characters” who offered “comedic relief” and had romantic story lines of their own. In addition, what Gabriel was describing, and Sam’s behavior also indicated there was a serious case of “sexual tension.”

Interesting. She was beginning to understand and recognize these things, all on her own.

She pulled out her note pad and wrote it down before she forgot, so she could bring it to Castiel’s attention later. Little did she know that Gabriel was leaning over her shoulder, until he was lightly tapping on the top of her head, and correcting, “ _Sidesplitting_ comedic relief, and _Delicious_ sexual tension. Duh.”

As caught off guard and embarrassed as Hannah was, she quickly scribbled out the notes she made, and changed them to what the archangel had instructed.

“ _Much_ better.”

\------------

Dean wasn’t sure what was real, or what wasn’t at this point, his mind was taking him into a thousand different directions. Not _one_ of them made sense. Especially the fact, that as Sam and himself walked through the woods he was _still fucking sparkling_. That was enough to make him punch a tree. But if it _was_ a Trickster, which he was thinking was more and more likely (because there was no way he had been fucked by an angel the other night) the Trickster could have gotten into his head, saw his dream and recreated the events to drive him crazy.

Which they were. He was going bat-shit crazy.

He was going to destroy this motherfucker, burn him to the ground, and dance on his grave.

Yeah. That was the only explanation.

Sam and himself were walking in tandem, and after he’d convinced himself (he wasn’t in denial, these were now facts) he really _was_ curious about what was happening with his brother. He was tense, strung too tight and looked half annoyed half... Something Dean couldn’t place for the life of him.

“Yo. Sammy. What’s going on in that noggin of yours?”

“Huh?” Sam snapped out of his thoughts, before digesting the question and shrugging, “Nothing. Just wanting to get this case over and done with. I’m sick of all this weird shit.”

“You’re telling me,” Dean grumbled under his breath. “At least you’re not a walking disco ball.”

“At least you’re not-!” Sam started to snap, and then hesitated before finishing with, “- being blinded by a disco ball?”

“Dude. You’re seriously on edge. Chill the fuck out, do I need to get you a Xanax or something?”

“I can calm Sam down, if he needs,” Castiel announced, as he appeared out of nowhere, and nearly gave both of them a heart attack. Per usual.

“I don’t know, Cas, I feel like your kind of sedative is not what I’m looking for right now,” Sam stated and shook his head, “But thanks anyway.”

Dean (still _firmly_ believing in his head a Trickster visited his dreams and was fucking with him) turned to Cas and quipped, “No Hannah today? You guys havin’ a spat or something?”

Cas tilted his head to the side, “No. No spat, she’s doing research, at the moment. I believe she may even... Be with the wolves.”

“Wait a minute-” Dean cut him off with a hand motion and a glare, “She knows where the weres are, and she hasn’t thought to _inform us_?”

“I-I believe they’re her friends?” Castiel ventured a guess, in an attempt to figure out the best way to set this ‘story line’ up. “When she was searching and found them, she formed a camaraderie with them. They’re trying to get her to join the pack.”

Sam looked at him blankly, trying not to roll his eyes because, _really_? _This_ was the best explanation Cas had? The best way for ‘Hannah to play the role of Jacob?’ This was going to crash and burn at any moment, and Sam had no way to stop it.

The older brother marched right up into Cas’ personal space and demanded, “ _Excuse me?_ An angel. Joining a pack of werewolves. Are you outta your fucking gourd? Or is Hannah? Do you always go for the fucking crazy ones or do they just naturally find you-” Dean stopped in the middle of his tirade when something caught his eye.

Without thinking, he grabbed the collar of Cas’ shirt, and yanked down to find a _fuckin’ painting_ of bite marks and hickeys. He froze, “what the fuck?” Because there was either one of two explanations for this.

His dreams weren’t really dreams.

Or he really _was_ fucking Hannah.

Cas pulled out of his grasp and quickly lifted the collar back up, panicking, because he hadn’t had the time, or mind, to heal the marks from the previous night. And now Dean had found them. And was staring at him with his jaw dropped, and hand frozen where it had tugged to expose the marked flesh. His face slowly melted into a bitter expression, then he tried to laugh it off.

“Well. Looks like you love the crazy, huh?” He slapped him on the back, in what was supposed to be a show of support, but it was _so hard_ it almost sent him _tumbling_ , “Good for you. _Were-angel girlfriend_. Weird. But. Good.”

Sam, out of sight, had his hand clasped over his mouth as the scene unfolded, and wanted to say _so many things_ , but _couldn’t_. What the hell could possibly be done to fix this mess?

Cas forced a smile, and straightened up from where he’d almost been knocked over in Dean’s ‘show of support.’

When Dean turned away, Cas couldn’t see it, but Sam sure as hell could see the kicked-puppy expression on Dean’s face. It almost made him want to confess everything and drop this stupid charade right then and there. Only... It wasn’t _his_ to drop. Instead, he was going to have to slap some sense into Castiel, because at this point, there was _feelings_ involved, and this wasn’t what he wanted for his brother. Fuck.

And Sam thought _he_ had problems.

\-------

They knew they had narrowed down the location, on the way to the vampire nest, with Castiel walking beside him and it was at that point Gabriel popped in next to him. He was only visible to the other angel, and Cas had to keep himself from flinching at the close proximity the man decide to manifest in. He now understood why he alarmed the Winchesters so much when _he_ popped in.

Gabriel skipped next to him, informing Cas, “It’s just about show time! We’re playing along to New Moon, obvi, since Hannah wants to be Jacob. Now, make sure you look _really_ bored, or like you smell shit the whole time. If you want to be a convincing Kristen Stewart. You know what to do.”

Cas gulped, because, he had a vague idea. The butterflies in his stomach were going crazy, because if this didn’t work... He had no idea what his next course of action would be. He noticed the archangel was gone from view, even though he could still _feel_ the power of his presence. It was hard _not_ to. How strange, that the most powerful angel on Earth was playing dress-up with Castiel.

“May I look at the map, again?” He asked casually, as he reached over to where Sam was holding onto it. “We’ll be arriving shortly, right?”

“Yeah, it shouldn’t be far, now,” Sam looked at him suspiciously, as he handed over the piece of paper.

“Ouch.” Castiel deadpanned, attempting to look as bored as Gabriel had instructed. “It looks as though I’ve acquired a paper cut.”

Dean raised an eyebrow, to the small bubbling blood on Cas’ fingertip, “Can angel’s even _get_ -?”

And, on cue, a vampire jumped out of the woods, looking blood thirsty and charging right for Castiel.

Sam and Dean drew their machetes, and ducked out of the way. Cas, on the other hand, wasn’t as quick to respond and was knocked on his back. He glared at the illusion of a vampire, and laid prone, because this was the time for Dean to save him, right? So he took the time to heal his ‘paper cut’ and smiled to himself as he heard the sound of running feet.

Even if the slice was smooth, there was still the sound of flesh tearing, and bone cracking, as the vampire’s head went flying, and the body collapsed on top of the angel. He grunted, and pushed the corpse off him, before Dean knelt at his side.

“Are you all right, Cas?!”

“Yes, he caught me off guard. I apologize.”

Dean rolled his eyes, and helped him to his feet before spinning around, “There has to be more. Shit, Sammy!”

He saw his brother, unconscious on the ground, and rushed to his side. Only, with his tunnel vision he didn’t see the blow that came to the back of his head, knocking him unconscious, too. Cas looked around, and saw no one there, but knew it was Gabriel. When he looked back, both brothers had disappeared, and he was alone in the forest. He frowned, and hoped Gabriel hadn’t hurt them _too_ badly, that was not his intention at all.

“Castiel,” Hannah’s voice caught his attention and he turned around. “I’ve been with Gabriel, discussing the plan. Obviously, we can’t account for Dean and his actions so we’ve... Tweaked it a little. We still want them to think it’s a case, but we will also want to implement the themes in the story. Come with me, and we’ll discuss it.”

“Very well,” Cas followed her, and could swear he heard the echoing laughter of their Trickster through the trees.

\----------

His head hurt. Like a bitch. And before he could even open his eyes, he could feel himself tied to the rough bark of a tree, and the itching, constricting feel of rope wrapped around his body and binding his hands together. He slowly looked around, trying not to make any sudden moves, while he looked for his brother. Who was already awake, bound to the tree next to him.

_Great_.

“Finally up?” A snickering voice asked, and Dean’s head quickly snapped to the sound, “You boys have been looking for us for a while. Apparently, you suck at Where's Waldo.”

Before them, stood a tall, lanky vampire with about five more, lounging in various positions along the tree line, waiting for their leader to make a move. Dean wanted to vomit, because _for the love of god_ , they were all fucking _sparkling_ too. Just like he was.

“Is there something in the water, Jesus Christ!” He snapped, “What’s with the glitter?! Seriously!”

He was two seconds away from stomping his feet like a child. If they weren’t bound, that is.

The vampires didn’t look alarmed at all. “Dean Winchester, weren’t you our brethren once?” A female with long blonde hair asked, as though she was speaking to a toddler, “ _Everyone_ knows vampires shimmer in the sunlight.”

“No!” Dean roared, “No, they don’t!”

“Have you ever seen a vampire in the sunlight?” The man leaned down and tilted his head with a smirk. “Think hard.”

“They have a point, Dean.” Sam stated simply, “I don’t know if w-”

“Shut up, Sammy!” He was enraged, “That’s besides the point! I’m not a fucking vampire! And vampires don’t sparkle! It’s nowhere in the lore, it’s only in teenie-bopper--”

“Are we really arguing about this when they’re trying to kill us?” The younger brother hissed out in a whisper.

“So true,” another one of the men circled the lead vampire and laughed, “The logistics, or rather _facts_ , don’t matter.”

“Please. Kill me, now, I’d rather die.” Dean groaned, and hung his head. But then he got an idea. “But would you really want to kill your ‘brethren?’” He challenged, raising an eyebrow, “Way I see it, you just lost one of your own, right? Don’t you need to fill your roster back up?”

Tapping his chin, the leader entertained the idea for a brief moment, “I wouldn’t mind having a Winchester on our side. Since you’ve already experienced the blood lust, if you were willing to come back-”

Sam rolled his eyes.

This game was so ridiculous, he almost wanted to kill himself too. His ropes weren’t even _tied_ , fuckin’ Gabriel. At least there was an advantage to being on Team Destiel. So, this was the part where he was supposed to pop out, tuck and roll to the side where they had ‘disarmed them’ of their weapons, untie his brother, and save the day, right? Painfully predictable. Fine. Fucking _fine_.

He used the vampire’s banter with Dean, to yank the ropes from his body, and did just that. He rushed to the left, where the machetes were _conveniently_ left out, and grabbed both their weapons. When three vamps charged him, he easily decapitated the first one, and swung at the second.

But he was lazy.

He thought this would be easy.

Of course, Gabe wouldn’t make things _quite_ as easy as the bullshit Romeo and Juliet hunt they were one.

So it shouldn’t have surprised him, when he was laying flat on his back, with the wind knocked out of him, and a snarling monster snapping for his throat.

“Shit!” He heard Dean gasp, and he heard him struggle against the ropes.

Sam kicked his leg up, and managed to knee the vampire in the gut, and send it tumbling off him. But soon, the next one lunged. Sam dodged, scrambled to his feet and ducked around the tree where he’d been ‘held prisoner’ to cut the ropes holding his brother from behind. “Think fast!” He shouted, tossing the machete to Dean as soon as his hands were free.

Dean easily caught the blade, and dove forward to cut the vampire in front of him’s legs out from underneath. He fell to the ground with a scream, and a thud, but still squirmed. He took delight in the pained look on his face, before he ended it with a quick slice. The blonde looked alarmed, as her leader fell, and turned her back to head for the hills. Only, Dean was _furious_. And it wasn’t hard to follow her goddamn _glow_. He chased her, like a bat out of hell, and grabbed her by the collar before yanking her back.

“Vampires. Do. Not. Sparkle!” He hissed, and cut through her juggler and tossed her dead body to the ground.

He took a deep breath, the rage in his body slowly simmering down, and looked back to where Sam had dropped the last of the vampires.

They were soaked in blood, from head to toe, but at least the nest was taken care of. However, alarm spiked up through Dean’s heart as his eyes darted around and demanded, “Where’s the angel?”

“He’s not here,” Sam answered, weaving through the trees, trying to catch any trace of Castiel.

He had to admit, he himself wasn’t familiar with the Twilight saga, so his concern was genuine. Sam honestly didn’t know what was going to happen next, so he turned around to Dean and gave him his best guess, based on what they’d talked about so far, “Where did we narrow down the wolf pack's location?”

“Not far, come on, let’s go!” Dean broke into a run, with Sam right on his heels.

\---------

Both men were out of breath, when they finally reached what they had suspected to be the werewolf headquarters, and were met with a log cabin in the woods. It looked abandon to the naked eye, but they looked for things that the average person would ignore.  Like the dusty  _paw prints_ leading up to the door, which appeared to be made quite recently.

“Thank god, this has to be it!” Dean exclaimed, and slowed down his pace to survey the area with caution. “But... Where the hell is the welcome committee?”

“What are you doing here?” A familiar voice of a woman demanded, slowly descending the steps of the porch.

“Hannah? What the hell?” Dean demanded, “Is Cas here? We were just jumped by vamps, and we couldn’t find him. Please tell me you scooped him up or something-”

“You weren’t able to protect him,” she narrowed her eyes. “So my wolf pack and I had to.”

Sam tilted his head to the side, as Hannah took on a downright aggressive tone, which was borderline terrifying. He couldn’t keep his comment to himself and echoed, “Your wolf pack?”

“Yes. He was in danger of you and your kind-”

“My _what_?!” Dean charged right up to her, “Slow your roll!”

“If you’re not with the vampires, why are you sparkling?” She challenged, crossing her arms.

“For the love of-!”

“Dean?” Cas’ voice cut through the beginning of his tirade, as he walked out of the house, surrounded by a pack of wolves, _nuzzling him._

“Cas. Mind telling me what’s going on?” Dean tried to push passed Hannah, but she pushed back, nearly knocking him on his ass.

“Dean...” His voice was hesitant, “You left me. Hannah and her wolves have been protecting me. Because you left.”

“The fuck! I was gone for, like, a half hour! And you can protect yourself, you’re stronger than the wolves!”

“That’s not the point.” The angel reached down to pet the head of one of the wolves who was beginning to growl in the presence of the human (or what he perceived to be a vampire, it didn’t matter). “You left. And now I have to decide between holding on to the past, or accepting my future.”

“What?!”

“I must choose.” Cas caught him in a lingering stare, and before he could say anything more, watched the man throw his arms up and turn his back.

“I’ve had enough bull fucking shit for one day! Have fun with your pups, Cas! I’d _choose_ to go fuck myself, if I were you.” And he stomped off.

Sam, Hannah and Cas exchanged alarmed expressions, but Dean was escaping at an alarming pace, so Sam had to _chase_ after him.

That... hadn’t gone as well as any of them hoped.

\--------

Dean was beyond pissed off, while he kicked off his blood covered clothes and turned the shower on. Everything that day had gone terribly _wrong_ and he wish he had someone to blame but he _didn’t_. There was no one to take his aggression out on, everything was fucked, Cas was going crazy, apparently, _and_ the bullshit with the werewolves and the vampires had done _nothing_ to ease his tension and overwhelming _jealousy_.

But _why_ was he so jealous?

Because he’d had a few, stupid wet dreams about Cas?

No, it was because those dreams had led him to _feelings_.

And _fuck_ feelings.

He was two seconds away from punching a hole in the wall when something distracted him and made him stop in his tracks. He leaned into the mirror, because he didn’t think he was injured in the fight, but bruises and scrapes weren’t uncommon, even on the best of days. This didn’t look like either of those. His fingertips brushed his chest, and the mark wasn’t brand-spankin’ new, so it couldn’t have been from the battle.

And he knew better.

Because he _knew_ these shapes.

They were _hickeys_. _Teeth marks._

Dean’s eyes widened, because this was exactly what he was giving Cas shit for that afternoon, and made him avoid the man like crazy and maybe it wasn’t Hannah and his first instinct had been right. No... there was only one way to know for sure.

That dream. .. It had been way _too vivid_. He remembered every second of it, and if it had really been what he suspected it was...

He propped one foot up on the edge of the tub, unceremoniously moved his junk to the side, and his heart skipped a beat.

Practically _glaring back at him_ was the perfect outline of teeth, which he remembered _very well_ from his dream, in the exact same place he’d been marked before being fucked better than he could remember ever being fucked in his entire lifetime.

Hell no.

It wasn’t Hannah who had left those marks on Cas.

It was _him_.

_This changed things._


	5. Nicki Minaj Enjoys Patron

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _“I’m going to give him a taste of his own medicine.”_
> 
> _“He hasn't given you any medicine.”_
> 
> _“Jesus Christ, you really haven’t learned any of the lingo since you've been down here?” Dean rolled his eyes, because it was like dealing with Cas all over again, only this time with Hannah, it was exasperating, and no where near as cute._
> 
> _“The entire time I've been down here, I've been assisting him court you,” her eyes narrowed, “I haven’t had time to ‘learn any of the lingo’ because I've been watching awful romantic comedies, outdated and irrelevant 'classics,' reading through trashy romance novels, and have poisoned my mind with abominable garbage like ‘Fifty Shades of Grey!’ I’m sick and tired of human pop culture and understanding these ridiculous emotions, and all the suffering humans are willing to go through for the sake of 'love,' and all Castiel has done for an ingrate like you!”_

What Dean took didn't count as a shower. It counted as him sitting on the floor, in the bathtub, with the water beating down on him as he sat in thought. Well, his thoughts didn’t really count as thoughts, either. His mind was running laps, his heart was beating out of his chest and he didn't know _what_ to think. He tried to put a timeline together. Beginning with when Cas started acting _weird_. He honestly thought it was a side effect of losing and gaining, rinse and repeating, his grace, but it might not have been like that at all.

All of those dumb references. All those dumb one-liners, and confusing situations he had put Dean in...

Was he trying to... “pick him up?”

In a dorky, nerdy, Cas-like way?

He banged his head against the back of the cheap tile, and it didn't even hurt, because his body was numb. Now that he could get a _really_ good look, he was surprised he hadn't noticed the marks on his hipbones too. But he couldn’t _really_ be blamed, right? Who checks themselves out every time they got dressed? Especially when they were in a hurry to go fight fuckin’ _monsters_.

Okay. Dean had come to terms with the fact that, yeah, Cas was probably, yet failing miserably, trying to flirt with him.

But how long had this been _real_?

Sure, he’d had dreams about Cas in the past, but they’d never been as _vivid_ as those he’d had recently.

And, he sure as fuck, he realized now, the last one wasn't a dream at all.

He should have _known_ , when the angel was floundering, those small moments of panic on his face - it was _real_. However, Dean just thought he was dreaming about Cas being the awkward dude that he was, and didn't pay any attention. You know, for authenticity. _Nope_. It was all a plan or ‘dream’ gone terribly awry.

So awry, that he’d managed to rip the roof off an _entire motel_ and make the _headlines_.

Dean started laughing.

All right, that was kind of _hilarious_.

What kind of angel would do that, just to be with one dumb, messed up human?

Shit, he didn't like where this was going.

Because the more and more he thought about it, the more _endearing_ it was. It was freakin’ _adorable_.

But that didn't change the fact that, now, Dean knew Cas plowing him in the ass wasn't just a random _dream_ , that’d really _happened_. How was he supposed to look at him when Cas was still pretending that Dean _didn’t know_? Dean shook himself and took a deep breath. When he got down to the nitty-gritty, he knew two things for sure.

Cas wanted _him_.

And Dean wanted _Cas_.

There was no doubt about it.

So. There was only one solution. Two could play at whatever the fuck game he was playing.

\-----------

“Sooooo!” Gabriel rubbed his hands together, with the angels and human in front of him, “I thought that went well.”

“If by ‘well’ you mean, _you_ were thoroughly amused, and enjoyed the show, then _yes_. It went _well_ ,” Cas deadpanned and narrowed his eyes at his brother. “The rest of us don’t agree with your definition of ‘well.’”

“I don’t know what was worse,” Sam groaned, and collapsed back to one of the beds, “The Romeo and Juliet mess, or this one.”

“Hey! Mine was _believable_!”

“He _did_ have much more power behind his charade than-”

“Hannah, don’t encourage him,” Sam sat up just enough to point a disapproving finger at her, before he laid back down. “Cas, why can’t you just confess, already. This is crashing-and-burning by the second. And now, Dean’s probably looking for a way to banish Hannah from her vessel and scorch her soul, and you’re on his bad list. It’s only going to result in bloodshed and I’ll be caught in the crossfire.”

“I’ll protect you, Sammy,” Gabriel appeared on the bed, next to him and ran a hand through Sam’s hair, “Don’t you worry about that sweet ass.”

Sam groaned and batted him away, but didn't have the energy for much else. So Gabriel took that as a good sign, and stretched out alongside him.

“So? Next plan?”

Castiel looked around the room, with slumped shoulders and mumbled to himself, “Maybe I should just give up.”

“ _No_!” Three voices answered, with different levels of intensity and anger, and all began talking at the same time:

“You didn’t not put us through this-”

“We’re seeing this mission through-”

“But the fun’s just getting started-”

“Fine!” Cas silenced them. “But... I don’t wish death upon Hannah. I don’t wish Gabriel to be banished. And I especially don’t want Sam to be ‘caught in the crossfire.’ Maybe this is something that I need to continue on my own.”

The room fell quiet, as everyone glanced at each other, thinking over Cas’ words, because really? Would the angel be able to handle it on his own?

Sam was the first to break, “Cas, he already likes you. That much is obvious. And he liked you before you tried to ‘win his heart’ with this plan of yours. Why don’t you just go back to, I don’t know, being _you_? And hang around more. And don’t play house with Hannah. He was in love with the _old you,_ without all the bells and whistles, you don’t have to try so hard, man. This was fun while it lasted, but I’m worried you’re just making things worse, not better.”

The woman in the room shrugged, “I haven’t been around your dynamic long enough, but I could tell from the beginning he was enamored with you.”

“Fucking duh!” Gabriel threw his arms up, “I was just here for the party. And to see the handsome devil to my right, of course. You’re fuckin’ blind if you didn’t see it before, Cassie.”

The seraph leveled a dark, malicious glare at each and every one of them, before growling out, “And _not one_ of you decided it was of import to _tell me this before?!_ ”

He received blank stares, because, if they were honest, Castiel looked really, _really_ terrifying in that moment.

However, Gabriel seemed to have balls of steel by quipping, “Uh. It’s not like the dream sex slash real sex would’ve given it away or anything.”

Cas turned his back abruptly, “I’m leaving. Please, no one follow me.”

“Castiel!” Hannah was slightly panicked, “Where are you going?”

“To drink a liquor store.”

Then, he was gone.

Sam shrugged, “I don’t understand why he didn't figure it out sooner.”

“His heart is pure,” Hannah challenged back, “He doesn't make assumptions, and that was chivalrous of him.”

“But boning him when Dean-o’s clonked out is oh-so innocent?” Gabriel rolled his eyes, “Poor little Cassie has his head all turned around. Guess that’s what love does to us.”

“I’m following-”

“No.” Gabriel stated, and it wasn't a suggestion. “Let him work things out by himself. We all need to drink our feelings once in a while, let the poor kid indulge. Besides, I don’t wanna be, _dad forbid_ , the voice of reason, or anything, but don’t ya thinking someone really should ‘return to Heaven’ and see if the place is falling apart or something? Because last I heard, _Cas_ was leading, and he’s been doing a piss-poor job.”

She rubbed her temples, and counted her breaths because Gabriel was right. “I’ll be taking my leave now. Please, watch over Castiel while I’m gone. Make sure he doesn't do anything... drastic.”

“Hah!” Gabriel threw his head back, “Anything like what he’s been up to the last couple weeks? Yeah. I’ll try to watch out for that.”

With the roll of her eyes (something she never thought she’d be able to do in front of a superior - until now), she zapped off too.

Sam narrowed a bitch face, after Gabriel was quiet for a _strangely_ long time, “Did you just say all that to get them to leave us alone?”

He shrugged his shoulders and grinned wolfishly, “It worked, didn’t it?”

“Gabe!” Sam rolled away, but didn't get up from the bed, “What do you want me to say? What is there to talk about? I thought you were dead. Now you’re not. You died when we were _finally_ on good terms, and then never decided to, I don’t know, _tell me you didn’t die_?!”

“A-hah!” Gabriel laid on his stomach, facing Sam with his chin in his palms, looking like he was in a middle school girl’s slumber party, “You _did_ miss me.”

“Yeah. I _did_.” He emphasized the word, staring at the ceiling with a scowl, but never finished the sentence.

“Hey,” Gabriel’s expression turned soft, “You know, sometimes you need to go underground. _Especially_ after all the bullshit that happened. Especially, when the angels knew I was back, they’d expect me to _fix shit._ And, low and behold, after the apocalypse that never happened, kudos, by the way, there was more angel shit that I didn’t want to be apart of. No offense. But I’d have been roped into that like a fuckin’ bull at a rodeo and that’s not what I needed, okay? I’m sorry, Sam. Can you honestly say, when Cas went renegade, when Dean skipped off to Purgatory, or when the angels fell you _wouldn’t_ have called me?”

Sam was still pouting, but understood his reasoning, “You would've been able to help us, why wouldn't we have called? It‘s not like you’d had to answer all the time.”

“ _And_ I wouldn’t have been able to stay away, because of _you_ , kiddo.”

That finally got Sam to look at him, and Gabriel’s face wasn't teasing, it was _honest_. And, fuck, if Sam’s heart didn’t skip a beat in his chest. The archangel took a chance, and reached one of his hands out to hold Sam’s. Instead of pulling away, he gave in and let him. He took it a step further, and tugged, forcing Sam to scoot closer until their noses were brushing. Even if it was an awkward angle, Gabriel leaned down and kissed the man’s lips underneath him, which were pliant and smooth to the touch.

He meant what he said: if Sam knew he was alive, he wouldn't be able to stay away. There had been many, many times he wanted to come back, to help, but he knew he’d be sucked right back into that world again and he’d much rather live his life away from it. But, _fuck_ , did he miss _this_.

Sam’s palm reached up to cup the side of Gabriel’s face, and shifted them enough so they were actually comfortable. However, Gabriel wasn't going to be comfortable until he was _on top_ of Sam. Which, he was quick to do, as their tongues started becoming reacquainted, and things got more heated. Gabriel’s strength was nothing to laugh at, because he soon had Sam laying in bed, the right way, while he was straddling his lap, and kissing him for all he was worth.

He pinned both the human’s wrists with one hand, and used the other to tease the muscled flesh under his shirt. His lips never left Sam’s, though, because he wanted to know the second things were going too far and he could always tell by the way Sam kissed him. However, that was _not_ the case, as their hips started rutting together in a _very_ _mutual_ rhythm, and the young Winchester was moaning into his mouth.

“Archangel Gabriel, Heaven is currently well organized and-” Hannah’s voice made them both jump, and pull away abruptly.

She stared, wide eyed before she shuddered out, “I a-apologize, I just wanted to inform you, I-I didn't mean to interrupt anything.”

Gabriel raised an eyebrow and made a shooing motion, “This is the part when you awkwardly vamoose and let us get back to business, mmk?”

“Yes,” she bowed in a jerky movement, “Apologizes, again.”

After she was officially gone, Gabriel looked down to Sam’s flushed face and snickered out, “All these newbies, I tell ya. Now where were we?”

“I’m still mad at you, you know,” he tried to glare, but it was cut short when Gabriel rolled his hips down on Sam’s _very obvious_ and undeterred erection.

“Yeah, yeah, we can turn this into angry sex, if you want?”

“Shut up,” Sam used his, now free, hands to tangle in Gabriel’s hair and drag him back down, “This is _reunion sex,_ first.”

“I’m in.”

\-----------

Dean was pacing in the room. Alone. Which was why he got away with pacing. If Sam was there, he’d get shit, and puppy dog faces about ’what’s wrong, Dean? Do you want to cry on my shoulder? Do you want to braid my hair?’ But no. No Sam. No Cas. No _anyone_. And it was _late_. Someone should have been there by now, and it was strange that there weren’t even any excuses popping up through text messages on his cell. However... Dean had a plan.

And now was the perfect time to put it into action.

He sat down on the edge of his bed, back straight, and body at attention, like he was preparing for battle. Since, in some ways, _he was_. He closed his eyes, and did something he _never_ thought he’d do. After a few silent words, he reopened them.

A confused looking woman was standing in front of him, with her head tilted, and body nearly as rigid as his.

She asked in an even more puzzled voice, after clearing her throat, “You... Prayed for me?”

“Trust me, sister, I’m as surprised as you,” he relaxed a little, now that the hard part was over, “So. You gonna tell me the truth, or what?”

“The... Truth?” She repeated back, almost sure she had been summoned to be smote, _this_ was not a question she had been expecting.

“Yeah. I know you’re in cahoots with Cas. Not lovey-dovey with him. So let’s cut the crap.”

“Did he tell you?” She looked excited for a moment, but then realized he _couldn't_ have, because Cas was currently a few bottles deep, more than likely a country over. “I just gave it away, didn’t I?”

“Yep. Ya sure did.” He smiled widely, “So. If you don’t want to get in trouble with your fearless leader, why don’t you help me out with a plan of my own?”

She clenched her fists. He had leverage over her now. Cas’ plan had been out of _love_ , who knows what Dean’s plan was going to be out of. Malice? Revenge? What had she gotten herself into?

“Where is he now? Does he know you’re here?” Dean nodded his head over to the chair closest to where he was sitting, “You didn't make an announcement when you left, right?”

“No...” she hesitated as she crossed the room and took a seat, “I believe he’s in the middle of getting quite intoxicated.”

Dean raised an eyebrow, “Last time he got smashed was when he found out that God didn't love all his children, why the hell is he going for gold _now_?”

She mumbled something under her breath, which Dean quickly snapped at her for, then repeated, “Maybe because he thinks you don’t love him.”

He wasn't too fond of the ‘L’ word, but he also wasn't too fond of the fact that he had driven Cas to the bottle. “Well, ya know, _you_ helped with that, _right_?”

“I was only following orders.”

“Yeah, great. Only thing angels are good for,” he scoffed, and took a moment before he looked back at her rejected posture, “Hey, sorry, nothing against you, or anything. It’s just gonna, uh, take a second for me to come back from the whole ‘scorned lover’ point of view.”

“So you _do_ love him!” She piped up, all insults forgotten at that admission.

“Woah, woah, I didn't say that!” Dean stopped her before she could cause anymore embarrassment, because that wasn't something he was ready to admit out loud. Hopefully his red cheeks didn't give away too much.

Except. _Shit_. He’d already told _Cas_ that in his dream slash not dream, hadn't he?

_Whatever_.

_She_ didn't know that, or at least he _hoped_ , but that wasn't the point right now.

“How long ago did he leave to drown his sorrows?”

“About an hour.”

“How long does it take an angel to get drunk?”

Hannah looked thoughtful, before she answered, “I’m unaware, because I've never attempted it. I also have no idea where he’s at, in terms of grace or power so-”

“I’ll give him a few, then.”

The woman didn't like the smirk on Dean’s face. She didn't like it one bit. All Cas’ plotting had been from a place of purity, but the way the Winchester was looking was... Anything _but_.

“You’re not going to hurt him, are you?”

“That’s what you think of me?!” Dean looked baffled, “Of course I’m not gonna fuckin’ _hurt_ him. I’m just going to give him a taste of his own medicine.”

“He hasn't given you any medicine.”

“Jesus Christ, you really haven’t learned any of the lingo since you've been down here?” Dean rolled his eyes, because it was like dealing with Cas all over again, only this time it was _exasperating_ , and no where near as cute.

“The entire time I've been down here, I've been assisting him court _you_ ,” her eyes narrowed, “I haven’t had time to ‘learn any of the lingo’ because I've been watching _awful_ romantic comedies, _outdated_ and _irrelevant_ ‘classics,‘ reading through trashy romance novels, and have _poisoned_ my mind with _abominable_ _garbage_ like ‘Fifty Shades of Grey!’ I’m sick and tired of human pop culture and understanding these ridiculous emotions, and all the suffering humans are willing to go through for the sake of ‘love‘ and all Castiel has done for an _ingrate like you!_ ”

Dean nearly fell backwards as Hannah invaded his space, and ended up _shouting_ at him by the end of her tirade.

“Woah, woah!” He put his hands in front of him in defense, even though it would do nothing to stop the angel blade she looked ready to pull out at any seconds, “Sorry for asking!”

Maybe this was the _wrong_ angel to pray to.

She huffed, and abruptly turned her back to him, before gathering herself, “Castiel loves you very much. If you wish to give me up, you may, but I won’t participate in anything that will hurt him.”

“Hannah,” Dean stood up and followed her, “I’m not gonna do anything to hurt Cas, I promise.”

She slowly turned around, every bit of her wary, but she knew by the look in his eyes he was sincere, “All right. Then if your intentions are true, I will assist you. Otherwise, as _you_ would say, you may ‘go fuck yourself.’”

“Damn,” Dean’s grin spread wide, “I think I may like you, after all.”

\-------------

Castiel was very interested in the way his feet were moving, as he stumbled through a park, with his eyes glued to the scuff marks on his shoes. He only looked up in time to narrowly avoid a tree, and then deposit himself on a rather attractive looking park bench. With his forehead resting heavily against his palms, he had to ask himself, what had went so terribly wrong? Why had things turned out this way? He always had the best intentions, but he seemed to be caught in a rat-maze of ‘good intentions gone bad’ and he felt as though he was back at square one.

No, not square one.

He was probably at square negative one.

“At least I didn’t unleash Leviathans into the world this time,” he mumbled, his own voice sounding strange in his ears.

That was a positive. Maybe he was improving...

He leaned back and looked at the sky. He could pray, it usually brought him peace, but this was his own plight, he couldn't concern his Father with his own selfish desires and immoral thoughts. He was lost. And, although, he was pleasantly numb, his mind wasn't numb _enough_. Some strange, unhappy noise came from his throat, as he debated whether or not he should acquire more liquor.

His feet wouldn't get him there, but the last establishment he teleported into didn't reacted favorably to his appearance. Hmm.

“Castiel?”

“I told you not to follow me.”

There was a slight creak in the bench, as the woman sat down next to him.

“G’away, Hannah. Or bring me tequila. The choice is yours.”

Hannah frowned, “Tequila? That is the most-” she shook her head, and decided not to follow that thought. “Heaven is well. Gabriel and Sam are having intercourse and left Dean alone. Perhaps this would be a good time to visit him?”

Cas raised an eyebrow, and looked at her, “Gabriel and Sam are...? Are you sure?”

“ _Quite_.” A blush rose to her cheeks, “ _Undoubtedly_ sure.”

“Interesting.”

“You didn't answer the second part of my statement.”

“No,” Cas sloppily shook his head, “He’s upset with me. I shouldn't see him in this condition, he’d see me weak and-”

Hannah gently set her hand on Castiel’s shoulder, to make sure she didn't startle him, “You should probably clear the air, don’t you think that’s a good idea? I believe the term ‘liquid courage,’ is applicable in these circumstances, don’t you agree?”

Castiel sat there, thinking, “What would I clear the air _about_? Without clearing _all of the air_? I’m not in the right place to confess. This isn’t the time, nor the place, nor the _everything_.”

“You’re miserable,” Hannah shook him, for good measure. “If you speak with Dean, I’ll retrieve the tequila?”

The angel quirked a brow, suddenly _very_ interested, “You will?”

“Yes.”

“I’d like Patron, please. The Paradiso Girls recommend it. As does T.I. And DEV. And Nicki Minaj... I like her music. _But that stays between us,_ ” he lowered his voice to a very menacing, almost threatening tone. Which, wasn't very threatening, due to the fact he was swaying on the park bench and the finger he pointed at her with was bobbing up and down.

“Um, yes. I’ll go find you Patron.”

“I’ll go to Dean now.”

\------

Sam wasn't going to admit it out loud, but he’d missed the feeling of Gabriel’s weight on him. The way the archangel actually stayed around for a while _after_. However, he wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction. He’d already let him have _too much_ satisfaction as it was. Still, Sam wasn’t complaining. He was grinning from ear to ear, and Gabriel noticed right away, and pinched his cheek.

“Still mad at me, Sasquatch?”

“It’s getting better.”

“It better be. I missed those toned abs and perky ass.”

“Then don’t die again, all right?”

Gabriel scoffed, “I’ll try my best. Just for _you_.”

Sam laughed, and was about to make a witty retort, when there was a knock at the door. They looked at each other with confused expressions, Gabriel pulled on his boxers and hopped over to the door to look through the peep hole. He opened it, barely giving Sam enough time to cover up, as Hannah walked in.

“Wow, never have I ever saw an angel _knock_ before.” Sam commented, while she stopped in the doorway.

“I didn't want to interrupt,” she cleared her throat, and amended, “Again.”

“Atta girl,” Gabriel teased, “She _can_ be taught!”

“I should get back,” Sam realized, and, while the sheet remained securely fastened around his waist, looked around for his boxers, “Dean’s gonna _freak_ , I've been gone so long.”

“That’s what I came here to discuss, actually,” Hannah quickly stated, “Dean-”

“What about Dean? Is he all right?” Sam was already on high alert, in regards to anything that had to do with his brother.

“He’s fine,” she assured him, “He... _knows_.”

Sam and Gabriel exchanged incredulous looks, but then again, it shouldn't have taken him much longer to figure it out.

“So... I’m banned from the room because he’s mad?”

“No, not at all,” she continued, “He is actually planning on speaking with Castiel.”

“Oh, god. This can’t be good,” Sam groaned, “Is he gonna flip out on him? Cas’ drunk, there’s no way this is going to-”

“He returns his affections, I can assure you. I’m just unaware as to _how_ he’s going to handle the situation.”

“Wait. So, Dean _knows_? And he’s not having a big gay freak out? And he’s _actually_ calling Castiel to ‘ _talk_?’” The human didn’t look convinced at all, “Are you messing with me right now, Hannah? Because that doesn’t sound like _my_ brother at all.”

“He prayed to me, and said he had a ‘plan of his own.’” She repeated, evenly, because, _once again_ , she had been swore to secrecy, “I do not wish to get in the middle of things. I was simply told to make sure you stay away until ‘the coast was clear.’”

“This sounds _terrifying_ ,” Gabriel’s face was full of glee, “And I can’t wait to hear about it! Wanna go for round two, Sammy?”

“Shut up,” he snapped, and then took another look at the woman, noticing something strange, “Hannah... Why do you have a half-gallon of tequila?”

“Apparently, Nicki Minaj enjoys it.”

Gabriel waggled his eyebrows back over at Sam, “Wanna talk about my Anaconda?”

\---------

Cas didn’t elegantly enter the hotel room he was instructed to visit. It was more like a crash-landing - he took out a chair and a lamp in the process. He quickly apologized to the furniture before remembering they were inanimate objects, and was just waiting to be chastised for his stupidity. But when he looked around the room, it was strangely... Empty?

He slowly, if not wobbly, sat the chair back up, and grabbed the lamp, only to set it on it’s side instead of upright. It was too broken to sit upright anyway. Similar to _himself_ , actually.

“Dean?” He asked into the room, and noticed the bathroom door was closed.

Should he wait? Should he come back later?

His head was doing strange things and his thoughts were jumbled. Yet, soon, the question was answered for him. The bathroom door opened, and Dean stepped out, “Oh, hey, Cas. Glad you could zap in.”

Wearing only a pair of boxers.

Castiel’s brain may have been short-circuiting as the man casually approached him, like nothing was out of the ordinary. Like he walked around almost-naked all the time. _Cas wished he did..._

“I know this is probably a bad time, since you were planning on drinking yourself into oblivion and all,” he began, strolling right up to Cas, and into his personal space, “But I had a question I was hoping you could help me out with.”

The angel tried to open and close his mouth a few times, before he finally managed a weak and choked, “Yes, Dean?”

“See, I was in the shower earlier, and I couldn't help but notice a few things,” Dean leisurely took hold of Castiel’s wrist, now close enough to feel his breathe on his cheek, “The fight was a blur, but these are _older_  than that, so...”

“Do you remember where I got this,” he moved Castiel’s fingertips to brush against the mark on his hipbone, slowly and seductively, “or _especially_ this,” and then fed off the angel’s stupor and brought the angel’s hand down to his inner thigh for Cas touch the brightest bite mark of all, “from? I was hoping you’d know... My memory is a little... _hazy_.”


	6. The Greatest Thing You’ll Ever Learn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _“Jesus, Cas! Calm down! You look like I’m gonna eat you.”_
> 
> _Cas couldn’t get away, the human’s hold on him with both his fist and his intense eyes were too strong. What was he supposed to say? That predatory look in Dean’s gaze... He knew... he had to know. Castiel was nothing more than a deer in the headlights. But Dean soon realized this, and grabbed the angel by the shoulders and shook him._
> 
> _“Dude. Are you having a heart attack?” His eyes were bright with concern as he raised his hand to Cas’ profusely sweating brow, “So you can play games with me, but I can’t play games with you? You go into self-destruct mode? Is that it?”_
> 
> _“No-no, Dean, I-”_
> 
> _“Spit it out, I’m not trying to kill you!”_

It was strange, Castiel thought, how he his jaw was moving, but it wasn’t producing sound. Well, maybe it was producing _sound_ , but not _words_ , like he had hoped it would be. As it was _supposed_ to be. His hand felt like it was on fire from the heat of Dean’s hand around his wrist... and the _feel_ of the soft skin where Dean was holding his fingers _between his legs_. “I-I... I-I-”

“Woah, Cas, no need to short circuit, I was just asking you a question,” his voice was a low and husky rumble against his ear. “I can’t help but think you were there when I got these, but I wanted you to refresh my memory.”

Yes. Yes, Dean was right, Cas had _long_ since short-circuited, and he was now in full-fledged fight or flight mode. He made a futile step back, nearly tripping over his own feet, and if Dean didn’t have a good grip on him, he would have sent himself _tumbling_.

He yelped as he stumbled, and Dean went after him with wide eyes, snapping, “ _Jesus_ , Cas! Calm down! You look like I’m gonna _eat_ you.”

Cas couldn’t get away, the human’s hold on him, with both his fist and his intense eyes were too strong. What was he _supposed_ to say? That predatory look in Dean’s gaze... He _knew_ , he _had_ to know. Castiel was nothing more than a deer in the headlights. But Dean soon realized this, and grabbed the angel by the shoulders and _shook_ him.

“Dude. Are you having a heart attack?” His eyes were bright with concern as he raised his hand to Cas’ profusely sweating brow, “So you can play games with _me_ , but I can’t play games with _you_? You go into _self-destruct mode_? Is _that_ it?”

“No-no, Dean, I-”

“Spit it out, I’m not trying to kill you!”

“You’re right.” Cas hissed, his (now free) hands rising to cover his face, “Whatever you think you know is true and I’m sorry.”

Dean didn’t let go of his shoulders, and rolled his eyes as the angel literally tried to hide from him, _right in front of him_ , “Hey. Come back here,” he pushed passed Cas’ hand to hook a finger under his chin to tilt his face up.

Very slowly ( _painfully_ slowly) Cas dropped his hands and his eyes made their way to Dean’s. Cas was shocked - the man didn’t look mad, he looked... Concerned? But _why_ would he be looking concerned? He should be _furious_ , after the selfish plots, being made jealous, forced into all these stupid situations and now finding out that the dreams _weren’t dreams at all_. He should he freaking out, but he wasn't? Cas found Dean being a much better a man than he.

The human smiled at him, and pulled Cas in close with his current hold and also looped an arm around the man's back. He did something that he’d been wanting to do forever - finally, _honest to goodness_ , feel Cas’ lips with his own and kiss him. He’d hoped it would calm the angel down. He was _half_ correct.

Cas calmed down all right.

_So far down_ , that if Dean hadn’t had him by the waist, he would have _hit the ground._

Dean had to think fast, as Castiel’s body went _limp_ in his arms, like a rag doll, and he rearranged his feet to support the dead weight. He grunted, and _swung_ the angel over to where he finally rested on the bed. With a huff, Dean ran a hand through his hair and rolled his eyes. So, they had sex, and one little _kiss_ made Cas faint? This was a joke.

He wanted to kick something, but instead, he stomped over to the bathroom to pull _on_ his clothes and pull _out_ his phone.

Dean quickly typed an SOS.

\----------

Not even five minutes later, there was the sound of a key card being jammed in the door, and his flustered looking brother running into the room. But he wasn’t alone. There was not _one_ but _two_ angels with him.

“What the fuck?!” Dean demanded, shooting up from his chair, “What is _he_ doing here?!”

“Heya, Deano! Long time, no see!”

“Dean! Can we focus on the fact that you just messaged me ‘ _I broke the angel,_ ’ please?!”

“I _knew_ a fuckin’ _Trickster_ was involved!”

“Hey, if I didn’t help out you’d still be dancing around each other and- oh. You _did_ break the angel,” Gabriel circled around the bed, to where Cas laid, passed out cold. He leaned over, and poked him in the cheek twice, before glancing back up at Dean. “How’d ya manage that? You’re both still wearing clothes, so I’d imagine it’s a different scenario than before-”

“You know about _everything_?” Dean raved, and looked back to his brother, “You were _all_ in on this? Are you shitting me, right now?!”

“I informed you about Sam-” Hannah began, only to be cut off.

“You didn’t _think_ to mention that _Gabriel_ was still alive, and kicking, and _sabotaging_ my life _again_!?”

“I’d hardly call it sabotage,” the man in question rolled his eyes, “So, when are we gonna talk about the little snoozing seraph we’ve got right here?”

Dean was too busy glaring at Sam to properly respond to the question. His brother was responding with puppy eyes, and a dejected slump of his shoulders, because he knew from the beginning he was going to get caught in the crossfire. And here it was. Guns blazing. And ricocheting. In his direction.

“Is he all right?” Hannah opted to ignore the staring contest the Winchesters were engaged in, and instead hurried to Gabriel’s side to check on Castiel. “Yes. He’s fine. He’s just... Quite intoxicated. I don’t know if it’s what you wanted or not, but he probably won’t remember any of this tomorrow.”

This caught Dean’s attention. “Are you sure?”

“His BAC is through the roof, we’re both pretty damn sure,” Gabriel lowered his hand from where it had been touching Castiel’s forehead. “I don’t know what you two were up to in here, but if you wanted a do-over, now would be a good time.”

“Thank god,” he mumbled under his breath, without meaning to.

“I take it...” the woman began, “Things didn’t go exactly according to plan?”

Dean crossed his arms, “Good guess, Hannah. My plan didn’t end with him _comatose_ , if that’s what you’re getting at.”

“Cut her some slack,” Sam finally spoke up, “She was just asking.”

“I think _I’m_ the one who needs to be cut a little slack!” Dean snapped, “All you idiots have been trying to play me, for God knows _why_ , and it’s over now, got it? You were assholes, you’re lucky I’m not banishing _you_ -” he pointed at Gabriel, “You’re lucky I didn’t try to carve _you_ up with an angel blade during your shitty acting,” he directed at Hannah, “And you’re lucky _you’re_ my little brother.”

“Well!” Gabriel crossed the room, “Glad that’s off your chest. Why don’t we celebrate our reunion with the half-gallon of tequila Hannah snagged in the other room?”

Dean grit his teeth, but he had to admit... He _could_ use a drink right now. “Only if you dicks help me with my own plan. We need to _fix_ this shit.”

\-----------

Castiel woke up, extremely disoriented and as though his head was being pounded like a drum head. He tried his best not to groan and whine like he wanted to, because it was his own decision that led him to feel like this in the first place. And, oh yeah, he could zap himself better anyway. Which he did immediately.

But then, when he thought back to the nights events, everything was _off_... Blurry. Hazy... where did he get that word from, and why did it stick out? Apparently, he had miscalculated how much alcohol he was able to consume with his weaning grace and had effectively ‘blacked out,’ as humans would say. The last thing he remembered was the... Park bench? And Hanna convincing him he should go to Dean...

_Shit_.

_Had_  he gone to Dean?!

He snapped up, out of the bed and looked around.

The room wasn’t the Winchester’s room, it was the one he and the other two angel had been holed up in the last few nights. How he had gotten here was beyond him, though. And he was alone.

“Hannah?” He called into the empty space, hoping she was nearby, hoping she had some answers, hoping he hadn’t done anything stupid-

“Castiel,” she manifested in front of him with a nod. “How are you feeling?”

“Mortified,” he answered quickly, “What happened last night?”

She pursed her lips together and slowly answered, “You fell asleep on the park bench before you were able to see Dean, as I had suggested. I brought you back here to sleep it off.”

He took in a deep breath and muttered, “Good. Good. I was... Extremely concerned. Where are Sam and Gabriel?”

“Sam’s with Dean. They’re headed back to the bunker right now, since the 'case has been solved' and they don’t have any other hunts at the current time. I think Gabriel is following them, probably harassing Sam while remaining invisible to Dean. He’s quite mischievous.” She quirked a smile, “Not what I was expecting of an archangel _at all_.”

“He is, indeed, mischievous.” Cas confirmed.

“What do you wish to do now?”

Castiel paused because... That really was a _good_ question. One he _didn’t_ have an answer to. Would Dean become aware of Gabriel’s presence soon? Was he still anger about their last charade? Did Castiel, _himself_ , even _want_ to continue, even if he had the assistance of an _archangel_? Nothing was turning out the way he had hoped, and he didn’t find any answers at the bottom of a bottle the previous night.

“I don’t know.”

“As Sam said...” Hannah began cautiously, “He _wants_ you there. Are you going to disappear, now that you’ve put in so much work? You can’t give up now.”

“But I feel like I have no other choice,” he admitted, defeat seeping into his tone, “I don’t even have a reason to join them in the bunker.”

“You need a reason? What about the reason of _friendship_? They’re not using you for your _powers_ , Castiel. That much is obvious. Dean wants your _company_. Maybe it will be better outside of a hunt so you can spend ‘quality time.’” She paused for a moment, “Wait until they have arrived, and visit soon? It would be foolish, not to.”

“I’ll take your advice, even if I’m wary.” He rubbed at his tired eyes and then froze, “I believe... Dean is praying to me? He sounds upset...”

“Go to him.” Hannah smiled, and urged him forward. “This invitation is all that you need.”

\--------

When Cas arrived, it was to see the Impala pulled off to the side of the road, Dean ranting, raving, and pacing. What could he be so upset about? Had... Sam told him?!

No. It was _then_ he noticed Sam running a hand down his face, exasperated.

And Gabriel was _corporeal_. Very, _very_ corporeal.

“Cas!” Dean shouted, and pointed a very angry finger at the archangel, “Did you know about this!?”

Cas approached with apprehension, “Know about-”

“Cassie!” Gabriel launched himself at the seraph and wrapped his arms around him, “Long time no see!” and then lowered his voice once Cas awkwardly returned the hug, “Thought it was time I spilled the beans to get you a ‘get out of jail free’ card.”

“Oh!” Cas smiled and patted Gabriel on the back, before turning to Dean with a very firm, “No, I did not. I’m happy you’re alive, Gabriel.”

“Yeah, so is Sam,” Gabe blew a kiss at the man in question, who blushed slightly, before adding, “Deano, however, is most definitely _not_. He was right about me playing the Trickster card. Thought it would be a fun way to make a grand entrance! And, sorry about the little bit of mind control yesterday, I bet you were confused about getting cozy with the wolves, and even _more_ confused about those hickeys I drew on your neck. I was trying to embarrass you, but it looks like I just pissed Dean off, so there’s that. Oops.”

Dean crossed his arms with a glare, his eyes never leaving Gabriel, even when his voice addressed Castiel, “Sorry for flipping out on you yesterday, Cas. Didn’t know _this_ little shit was gonna put the mind-whammy on you and Hannah and make you act like _idiots_. Another ‘play your roles,’ bullshit after-school-special, huh? I’m gonna fuckin’ _kill_ you!”

_Yes_ , Cas’ face lit up, Gabriel _was_ saving his ass.

Even if Dean was furious, at least his anger wasn’t directed towards Castiel, which was a lovely, hopeful change of pace. He couldn’t have prayed for anything better! It was a shame Sam seemed to be caught in the middle. Cas took it upon himself to walk over to the human while Dean and Gabriel were yelling at each other, and whisper to him, “How was your night last night? If I remember correctly, when I was intoxicated, Hannah told me you and Gabriel were having intercourse? Congratulations.”

Sam was so caught off guard, he hauled off and _punched_ Castiel in the shoulder, which did little but bruise his _own_ knuckles, “What the fuck! You can’t just _say_ things like that!” He hissed in a whisper, “And you sure as _hell_ don’t say ‘ _congrats_ ,’ dude!”

Cas cocked his head to the side as Sam turned bright red and looked flustered, “I thought it was a good thing? Why are you so upset?”

“Shut up, Cas. Just. Shut. Up.”

They looked back to the battleground in front of them, and Gabriel was giving them a knowing smirk, and a _wink_. Which turned Sam a _deeper_ shade of red.

“I hate my life,” he mumbled under his breath, and wished there was a cliff nearby, so he could _swan dive off it_.

“Okay, it’s time to calm down, buddy, I said I was sorry, which I very, very _rarely_ do. So, let’s move on with our lives, yeah?” Gabriel had a hard time dragging his eyes away from Sam, but had to do so when he was addressing Dean. “You were right. Trickster. Blah blah blah. Take pride in that! And get over it. No one was hurt. Sorry, I bruised your _ego_ , but I’m back and I missed you boys so it’s time to have a cute little reunion!”

“Cute reunion, my ass,” Dean hissed, and stomped over to where Cas was standing, grabbed the angels wrist and began to drag him away from the scene.

Castiel almost tripped over his own feet, when he was randomly yanked, but followed eagerly. He savored the warm touch of Dean’s hand, and wished he could lace their fingers together... It would be _much_ more romantic, and _nicer_ than the way Dean was currently man-handing him. But this was leagues better than nothing at all.

Once they were out of hearing-range, Dean halted, which caused Cas to _collide_ into him with the abruptness of the stop.

“Sorry, sorry,” Cas pulled away.

But noticed Dean didn’t let go of his wrist. He must have forgotten.

Cas wasn’t going to say anything, because he didn’t want it to end.

“I am sorry about yesterday. Fuck, if I had _known_ it was him... I don’t even know. I thought the Lucifer showdown was the last we’d saw of him, but _obviously_ I was wrong,” he grit his teeth and slowly made eye contract with Cas. Very, _very_ slowly. Because, _first_ , his eyes roamed up his neck, lingered for a _sinfully_ long time on his lips, and then he _finally_ met his gaze. Cas felt shivers going down his spine. Especially when Dean _licked his lips_.

“It’s-” Cas awkwardly cleared his throat, “It’s all right. Yesterday was very... _Confusing_ , to say the least. I’m glad it’s over and done with.”

“Yeah,” the human gave a soft smile, “Me too.”

“What... What are you going to do about him?”

“I have no fucking idea, man. Yeah, he fucked shit up, but he didn’t _hurt_ us. As much as I hate to admit it, Sammy has a soft spot for him, and vice versa, but I _hate_ him,” Dean groaned and let his head roll back in frustration. “He had the balls to ask us to ‘hang out.’ What the hell, man, hang out?! What does that even _mean_!?”

Dean’s grasp around his wrist tightened as he got worked up again, and the angel gulped, hoping this wasn’t when he realized he was still touching him... He didn’t want him to let go... And he... didn’t?

“Hang out?” Cas repeated the words, “I’m unsure. Gabriel’s intentions towards you weren’t evil, they were... Playful? Maybe he _did_  solely wish to make a dramatic entrance. I believe he achieved his goal. How is Sam reacting?”

“That’s another thing! Sam’s being _weird_ , he won’t even get into it with him. He’s just being a referee. He should be on _my_ side, Gabe’s an _asshole_ , and has done nothing but fuck with us, and Sam- Sam...” Dean struggled for the right word, looking over his shoulder to see the two were actually _talking_. “Sam’s already _forgiven_ him, or something. I don’t get it, Cas.”

“He has a different bond with Gabriel than you do.”

“Is it _profound_?” Dean teased, and this time, he deliberately squeezed Cas’ wrist, letting his hand slip down to tangle their fingers together.

Cas’ eyes widened, because Dean was _well aware_ he hadn’t let go. And now they were... holding hands? What was the protocol, what was he supposed to do in this situation!?

“That’s a question for Sam,” he quirked a grin. “I’m sure Gabriel would immediately agree, after all.”

“Oh, god, shoot me, now.”

“I don’t wish to-”

“Good to know,” Dean leaned in, just enough that he could feel the words tickle his ear, “Let’s go handle this, yeah?”

“Handle... What?” Cas stuttered.

The human laughed out loud and released Cas’ hand, just to squeeze his shoulder, and spin him back around. “Our Gabriel problem. What else did _you_ have in mind?”

“Nothing!” Cas said, almost too quickly. “Yes. Let’s handle. That.”

\--------------

“Nice set up ya got here!” Gabriel looked around as he walked into the bunker, head flicking back and forth as he took in the sights, “Not very home-y. But it’s probably a wet dream for the nerd over here, huh?”

Sam had been easily ignoring most of Gabe’s lewd jokes, having many days prior to get used to them. Not much phased Dean to begin with, so he only scoffed and muttered, “Still have no idea how you managed to weasel your way in here. My brother and angel are a couple of schmucks.”

“ _Your_ angel, huh?” Gabriel wiggled his eyebrows, and smirked at Dean, “So _possessive_. Guess my little act did wonders for shoving you out of your closet, there.”

“Shaddup.” Dean didn’t bad an eye.

He didn’t _deny_ it, either.

Which Sam and Gabe knew, was part of the plan. But _Castiel_ didn’t.

And it made his heart speed up in his chest.

“Ignore him, Dean. He’s just being Gabriel.” Cas thought he was doing damage control, and easing the other man's mind.

What he _didn’t_ expect, was Dean wrapping an arm around his shoulder and casually saying, “Yep. He doesn’t bother me.”

Cas shuddered at heat of Dean’s body returning to him. He was being so... Affectionate? Physical? _What_ caused this change? Was it the fact he was trying to ‘make it up to Cas’ due to the fact he had freaked out the previous day? Was this pity? Castiel found himself frowning deeply at the revelation, it felt like someone had dumped a bucket of ice-water over him.

“Yo, what’s with the face?”

“It’s my face, Dean.”

“Yeah, you looked like I kicked your puppy, or something,” Dean released his grip, and changed his direction to the kitchen, before Cas could protest that he didn‘t have a puppy. “Sammy! Think we’ve got any chow here, or is it a take-out night?”

“Eh, 50/50 chance. Check expiration dates so you don’t die,” Sam walked into the room and raised an eyebrow to where Cas had stopped in his tracks. “You okay?”

“Yes. I believe so.” He shook himself lightly, before turning to Sam and lowering his voice to a whisper, “Was Gabriel manifesting his idea, or yours?”

“I may have lost a bet!” Gabriel announced, wrapping an arm around Cas’ shoulders before winking, “Helped _you_ out, didn’t it, sunshine?”

“Yes, and I thank you, very, very much.”

“So, what’s the plan for the day?” The archangel grinned widely, pulling Cas in conspiratorially. “Do we get to have a little fun?”

“There is no plan!” Sam hissed, “That was _also_ part of the bet you _lost_ if you remember correctly.”

Gabe sighed and rolled his eyes, “Already got me wrapped around his little finger, that one. Or rather his dick, because I’d never be whipped for less than great sex-”

A plate shattered against the tile in the entryway to the kitchen. Where Dean had started to emerge from, only to be _slapped sideways_ by Gabriel’s brazen comment. A sandwich hung loosely in his hand, and threatened to fall apart and join the rubble on the ground at any point. He glared. Honestly had a _death-stare_ in his eyes as he looked at his brother.

“Sammy.” His voice was even, and monotone. “He better be talking out of his ass again. If he’s around because...”

He couldn’t finish the sentence.

While he had, indeed, been acting early about being mad when Gabriel decided to pop in, having chatted and caught up with the man the previous night, with limited hatred, _this_ was something out of _left field_. They’d been so casual, no words had been said about _this_ , even though all Dean had really cared about was talking about _Cas_ , and what to do _next,_ but _still_. This was enough to take back all the good things he had said about the angel, and _then_ some.

Everyone’s silence was _all he needed_. Sam didn’t jump up to defend himself, giving him a bitch face and moaning, ‘Really, Dean?!’ Gabriel wasn’t making a lewd joke, and hell, even Cas looked _guilty_ , and seemed to be in on it.

_Oh, hell no_.

“You’re fucking _Gabriel_?!” Was the only thing Dean could manage to get out of his mouth.

“Well, if you wanna get technical, I’m actually the one who’s-” Sam slapped a hand over Gabriel’s mouth, right at the same time Dean began to _charge_.

And then _tripped_ , and fell on his _face_ , because Cas was at his feet, cleaning up the broken ceramic plate, and a piece of lettuce which had dropped from Dean’s sandwich.

The angel nearly yipped, as the hunter fell in slow motion, and tried to _launch_ himself to protect his fall.

Which, of course, meant Dean ended up _sprawled_ across Cas’ body, with a _mouthful_ of dark hair, and the wind knocked out of him.

“Makin’ out escape _now_ , Sammy,” Gabriel hissed, and then the sound of feet _running_ echoed down the halls of the bunker. And Dean _growled_.

But he wasn’t angry enough to chase them, because he may have _squished_ his angel. Who’s face was currently pressed into the tiled floor and looking extremely uncomfortable. He rolled off quickly, and muttered, “Shit, Cas, I didn’t see you there.”

“It’s quite all right, Dean. I forgot to wear a bell,” Cas winced, and rubbed a hand over where his face had become _very close friends_ with the unforgiving ground, and slowly sat up.

With a brow raised, Dean asked, “Did you just make a _joke_ , Cas?”

“I attempted?”

“Pretty good,” he clapped him on the back and chuckled, “So. Now I feel like an asshole, so good job defusing the situation.” He shrugged, “Can’t really stay mad at you when you’re looking cute like that, huh?”

With big, owlish eyes, Cas blinked, “Cute?”

“Yeah,” Dean scooted a little closer from where they were sitting on the ground. “You just-”

Cas raised his hand quickly to silence him, and narrowed his eyes, “I believe you’re patronizing me because you feel you were unjustly angry with me yesterday, but you don’t have to do that, Dean. Although I appreciate your attempts to give me attention, I do _not_ appreciate them done out of some form of _pity_ , or because you feel you owe it to me. So, stop. Just… yes. That will be all.”

“The hell, Cas!” Dean reached out and grabbed his hand to pull him back down, before he could stand. “You think _that’s_ what I’m doing?! You’re a friggen _idiot_.”

The angel was expecting him to look _sheepish_ , to admit he was trying to make up for the way he had treated him in the midst of their failed ‘Twilight’ attempted. He did _not_ expect the man to _grab_ him by his shirt collar and haul him in for a _kiss_.

Cas was wide-eyed and unresponsive, until Dean wrapped his other arm around Cas’ neck and scooted closer to him on the floor. He pulled away just enough to mutter into the angel’s ear, “This is where you’re supposed to kiss me back, Cas. FYI.”

“Oh! Um-” and then he did just that.

It wasn’t like he hadn’t kissed Dean before. But, he thought to Dean’s knowledge, _Dean_ hadn’t kissed _Cas_ before. But _Dean knew_ they _had_ , even if _Cas_ didn’t know _that_ \- and _Dean_ had also kissed him while in his _right mind_ , even though Cas didn’t _remember_. It was a million kinds of confusing, and even more kinds of fucked up - but Dean was doing his best to remedy the situation right then and there.

The happy noises Cas was making while their tender kisses continued, told him he was on the right track. Finally.

This was what they both wanted. Although Dean and the rest of the group had spent a ridiculous amount of time discussing what the best course of actions would be, Dean kept coming back around to one thing:

_He wanted Cas_.

He’d wanted him for _too long_ , and he was sick of _waiting_. If he had to attack the angels face, butter him up, just do _something_ to make him see without Cas ending up _unconscious_ again, _that_ was his plan. He was sick and tired of it already. He’d been jerked in too many directions, and couldn’t deal with it anymore.

Dean pulled away and raised a hand to cup Cas’ face. A little breathless, he asked, “Can we stop with the games already?”

“G-games?” He stuttered, flushing all the way to his ears.

“Yeah,” Dean cleared his throat. “ _Both_ of us,” and he quirked a small smile, "You're the first boy I ever kissed, Cas, and I want you to be the last."

“S-Sweet Home Alabama? You know? _Knew_? How long have you-” Cas gaped, listening to Dean using his _own_ tricks against him.

“Long enough to know that this is _stupid_ , and I’m one pop song away from _banishing_ your ass back to heaven if we don’t tumble around on _my_ memory foam _right the fuck now_.” He grinned from ear to ear at the shocked look on Cas’ face, “If you pass out on me again, I’m gonna wring your goddamn neck.”

“ _Again_?!” Cas squeaked as quietly as possible.

“Shut up. I told you, this is getting old,” Dean stood up, and extended his hand down to where Castiel was still a little dumbfounded. “Or do I need to explain it with another dumb pop culture reference to get it through that thick skull of yours?”

“N-no, I believe I understand.”

“You understand _this_ reference?” Dean raised an eyebrow and tugged Cas up from the floor, and then led the way down the hall. “You're learning, Cas.”

“The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in-”

“And I’m _literally_ gonna fuck you until you can’t _talk_ for a _week_.”

“I find this agreeable.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> While this is the end of the fic (there will, more than likely, be an epilogue) I’ll probably be writing some timestamp extras of Cas and Hannah’s plans gone wrong. I’m taking requests! Feel free to comments with any disaster romances you’d enjoy seeing fall apart at the hands of awkward angels <3 Thank you lots and lots for reading!


	7. Epilogue - Billboard Hot 100 Seduction

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _“It’s Sunday, Dean.”_
> 
> _“Yeah, Cas. What about it?”_
> 
> _“Take me to church.”_
> 
> _“Why do you wanna go to church?” His brows scrunched up in confusion._
> 
> _“I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies. I'll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife. Offer me that deathless death - good God, let me give you my life. Take me to-”_
> 
> _Dean stood up abruptly, which sent Cas tumbling to the floor._
> 
> _But Castiel didn’t stop there, and crawled after him. “There is no sweeter innocence than our gentle sin. In the madness and soil of that sad earthly scene. Only then I am human. Only then I am clean. Amen.” After all, leaving a prayer unfinished was simply unacceptable, but when he did finish... the human was gone._
> 
> _But he heard Sam’s voice echo through the bunker - “Hey, I liked that one, Dean. At least it was kind of applicable.”_
> 
> _“Shut your fucking face.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh hey! Bet you forgot about this. I may have, too... but here's the epilogue! Timestamps are still in the works <3

“Are you watching me sleep again?” Dean muttered into his pillow before finally making the move to roll over and, naturally, be greeted with the bright blue eyes of a confused looking angel.

“Of course. I’ll always watch over you-”

“Didn’t you say you fell asleep with me before? Why can’t you just _try_ that for once?” He tried to sound grumpy, but the good nature teasing brightened his words as he leaned forward and nudged Cas’ nose with his own. “’Sides. Cuddling much more fun when your big spoon isn’t gawking at you.”

Castiel answered with a huff, “I did accidentally fall asleep after having extremely stressful intercourse, but nothing has drained me since then.”

With a scoff of his own, Dean quickly maneuvered the two so he was pinning the angel to the bed. “You sayin’ we’re not working hard enough at sex, Cas?” He closed the distance between them, allowing his lips to just barely brush over the angel’s. “Are you filing a formal complaint?”

“N-no! That’s not what I’m suggesting at all, I was merely stating-”

Dean couldn’t help but kiss him. Castiel looked so fucking cute all flabbergasted and blushing pink. His lips crashed downward and took the other man’s breath away. Dean felt hands clamp down on his hips without a moment of hesitation, and fingers press roughly into his tender flesh. He was getting the angel riled up, all right. One of his favorite things to do these days was wake up with Cas in his bed, and be able to kiss him, hold him, and if someone’s dick ended up in someone’s throat, who was the wiser?

Yep. Mornings were _awesome_.

Their hips lazily rolled together, until Cas catches him off guard and shifts their weight again. Soon, it’s all groping hands and sloppy mouths, and the sheet was pulled over them, blocking out the morning sun. Or at least that’s what Dean _thought_ it was about.

Things were heating up, Cas’ teeth were grazing his neck, while his hand was cupping Dean’s erection through his precum-soaked boxers. He was panting and grinding against the angel’s touch and wanted the remainder of their clothing gone. _Pronto_.

Cas was sucking kisses into Dean’s skin - he could feel the tingling first-touches of hickeys and preened under the attention. The fact that _these_ were his mornings… he couldn’t ask for anything more.

The sheet kept getting in his face, though, and when he tried to bat it away, Cas held it down, and whispered into his ear, “I love lying next to you, I could do this for eternity. You and me, were meant to be in holy matrimony - God knew exactly what he was doing when he lead me to you…”

“What are you-” Dean stammered out and ripped the covers off both them, since he felt like he was getting _smothered -_  not only _bedding_ but _words_ that were too heavy for his morning wood.

The hunter was blinded by the sunlight and squinted to see Cas with the sheet settled on top of his wild bed head. He looked concerned, and tilted his head, before reaching out and informing Dean, “Boy, I adore you.”

“You’re doing it again,” Dean hissed out and glared. “Cas!”

“It just seemed appropriate, I feel I can relate to ‘Adore You’ by Miley Cyrus, and in the music video she-” Cas’ face was soon assaulted by a pillow.

A pillow that continued to beat down on him left him flustered until it was _held_ forcefully over his _face_. He clawed at the air and wondered if Dean really meant to cause physical harm to him? What about the young pop star could have him so offended? The lyrics were honest enough, and he would tell him how-

The force behind the pillow was gone, and Cas slowly lowered the aggressive bag of cotton. When he looked around… so was the man. Gone. He sat up and sighed.

“Baby, can ya hear me? When I'm crying out, for you…” he tried again, utterly convinced it was the correct approach.

…But after he heard the door to the bathroom shut and lock he knew that he was incorrect…

He could have sworn he heard Dean curse, “Fuckin’ bangerz,” before he slammed it, though. Which made Cas smile that he _had_ understood that reference.

\--------

As it turned out (to no one’s surprise) Cas was an absolutely _terrible_ chef. Like, going down in the history books for setting grease fires in record time, and then thinking it was a sign from his Father and quickly changing his recipe to s’mores, so he could cook over an open fire. And by the time he’d finally found the marshmallows, the bunker was going wild with sirens, and the sprinklers were trying to kill the fire that was already licking at the counter tops and cabinets.

It was a very sad day.

So, once they’d gone through renovations, Cas couldn’t. Touch. Anything.

He begrudgingly agreed. It was probably in everyone's best interest.

However, that didn’t keep him from hovering over Dean’s shoulder to watch him, asking questions, sticking his finger into whatever his concoction he was making (a _terrible_ decision when he hadn’t realized once it was a raw seasoned heap of cow flesh for burgers) and generally trying to learn in case the opportunity to cook arose again.

He was still embarrassed, to say the least.

One day, when Dean was baking, Castiel realized it was his favorite time to jump in and taste the cookie dough. So he tried to make as much noise entering the kitchen, as to not cause Dean to jump, and once he was close enough - he wrapped his arms around Dean’s middle from behind.

“Hey,” Dean turned his head and kissed Cas on the brow, “You heard from Hannah lately? I sent her out to get more sugar for the second batch of cookies. Gabe made a special request.”

“Mm,” Cas nodded in acknowledgement, taking a moment to nuzzle against Dean’s neck.

He was happy, content and warm against Dean like this. He loved it.

Which was why, while his guard was down, he whispered, “Pour some sugar on me, ooh, in the name of love,” into the man’s ear.

Lightening fast, Dean had a spatula in his hand, had wrenched himself out of Castiel’s embrace and instantly _smacked_ him on his arm with an explosive, “Get out.”

“But Dean-”

The assault continued, _just_ like the pillow from days before, and even though it didn’t hurt at all, smack after smack made Cas step backwards until he was out the door, and effectively shooed away.

He sighed, hung his head, and walked away.

Castiel was disappointed, he at least thought Dean would appreciate the fact that he quoted a classic rock song. He was mistaken. _Again_.

\---------

The honeymoon stage was just that - a honeymoon. And it included lots and _lots_ of sex. After a hunt and a few beers at a bar (after they cleaned off the blood) -they stumbled into their own motel room, high on adrenaline and growing lust. Cas barely had the common sense to lock the door - right before gripping Dean’s hips and shoving him down to the bed.

He thrived on moments like this, devouring his lover’s hot mouth - teeth clashing and biting while they struggled to rip each others clothes off. As easy as it would be to simply snap his fingers and mojo them away, the desperation of clawing at each other, and the fight to rid themselves of the barriers was thrilling all by itself. Cas had Dean pinning underneath him, sucking on his neck and violently ripping his jeans and boxers from his body.

His flannel and undershirt were already long gone, and he took advantage of the beautiful expanse of skin laid out in front of him. His breath was hot as he nipped down his torso, paying special (if not a bit more gentle) attention to Dean’s nipples and basking in the way he whimpered. Cas couldn’t stop thinking about how _stunning_ he was - the way every little touch, no matter how light _or_ aggressive - sent him spiraling downward into a mess of squirming limbs and rolling hips.

Castiel’s tongue finally left the man’s chest, and he raked his nails down Dean’s ribs - leaving red trails in their wake. Once he was hovering over the other man’s erection, he took a moment to glance back up. Dean was staring at him, with nothing short of awe in his eyes as he whined out, “C’mon, babe. Need it.”

He never broke eye contact as he gave into Dean’s request - swiping his tongue over the head of his erection and lapping off the salty precum. Dean tossed his head back, the touch felt _electric_ as Cas continued to tease, licking over his cock at random. It was a game - as he flattened his tongue and let saliva coat him him from the base all the way to the tip - or swirled around the head - but never _quite_ took him into his mouth.

With every new touch, Dean rocked his hips upward, hoping he would just give in already. When he wouldn’t, he tried begging again.

“Cas… Cas… need you to do _something_. Suck me off or fuck me, this is too much-” he was gasping, wrapping his fingers in Cas’ hair and jerking to get his attention.

Finally, the angel looked up at him through lust-blown eyes and took his entire cock down his throat, humming as if to say, ‘fine.’ The vibrations echoed through Dean’s whole body and the heat sucking down on him made him hit a new level of pleasure. Goddammit, every single time Dean was caught off guard with how fucking _amazing_ Cas sucked his dick. It was like an out of body experience, especially when he felt himself bump the back of the man’s throat, and Cas’ lips wrapped all the way down to the thickest part of him. He was a writhing mess, and tonight he didn’t hold back his thrusts, and started fucking into Cas’ mouth.

The angel could handle it, he’d proved that on multiple occasions.

So why _not_ take advantage of it?

It was only when his cries became louder that Cas pulled away, and brought his hand up to squeeze around the base of Dean’s cock. He ordered him (in that fucking sexy I’m-an-all-powerful-being way) “You will not cum yet. Not until I fuck you.”

Dean quickly nodded and spread his legs, “Better get your ass in gear.”

If Cas was on Dean’s level of humor, he would have said something like, ‘No, I’m getting _your_ ass in gear,’ but he completely missed out on the chance to make that witty retort.

Once again - the honeymoon stage was _awesome_ , because with the ridiculous amount of sex they’d been having recently, his first two finger (after being slathered with lube) _easily_ slid into Dean’s hole. When he worked in a third, there was a little more resistance, but nothing that made Dean uncomfortable - he just spread his legs wider and tried to push down and meet Cas’ fingers as they pumped in and out of him. It was annoying (but not really), how _caring_ Cas was - the fact that he’d never hurt him - and he always took this part very seriously when Dean would rather him just dive in already.

Even if it _was_ quick - it still felt like an _eternity_ because the human needed the angel _now_. He wouldn’t get mouthy - that was a lesson he’d learned. When he got mouthy, Cas began to tease, as if to teach him a lesson. So instead of forming syllabus and enunciate the urgent craving with his mouth - he made his jaw hang loose and whimper out groans instead. Castiel liked it when he was loud, and if Cas’ heavy, rock-hard cock was anything to go by, the angel was about to lose it at any moment.

His fingers disappeared, the obscene slicking noise of Cas wetting his erection with lube made Dean tremble, and soon the thick head was grazing his entrance. His eyes flew open and watched.

It was one of his favorite things.

The sight of Cas’ huge dick stretching him, and disappearing into his body… the sight of them becoming one… it almost made him cum right then and there.

God, the feel of being this _full_ , Dean shuttered when Castiel bottomed out, and draped himself over Dean so he could kiss him all over again.

He didn’t give him time to adjust, they were both too desperate - he started rocking, building up a rhythm immediately as he sucked Dean’s lips until they were puffy and swollen. Dean moaned into his mouth as Cas gripped his wrists to restrain him and then nailed his prostate. “ _Fuck_ ,” he hissed into his mouth - the pleasure overwhelming.

Except, unlike the usual dirty talk Cas’ mouth pours out, Dean could have swore he heard something like, ‘ _But don't deny the animal that comes alive when I'm inside you,_ ’ mumbled in-between bites to his neck.

He tried to ignore it, he tried to focus on the fact that his angel was fucking him within an inch of his life - his balls slamming against Dean’s ass with every rough thrust, the grunts and moans that were filling the room…

“Baby, I'm preying on you tonight, hunt you down eat you alive. Just like,” Castiel _punctuated_ _every_ _thrust_ with the chant of, “animals, animals, like animals-mals.”

Okay, he _definitely_ heard that one right.

“You want a fuckin’ animal?!” Dean hissed out, a sudden wash of annoyance running through his veins. “I’ll show you a fucking animal!”

He shoved Cas back with all the strength in his body and sent the man toppling backwards on the bed, dick sliding out of him, and everything. Dean moved quickly, crawled on top on him and sat on his cock in one swift motion. At the same time, his hand shot up and clamped down on Cas’ mouth, unable to hear a single word out of him. He could still breathe through his nose, and that was all that mattered. He glared down at the angel, who’s eyes were wide with surprise and lifted his body nearly all the way off, and then slammed back down.

And now, this had _very much_ turned from heated, passionate sex, to borderline _angry_ sex. Dean was brutal while he was riding Cas cock, the man struggled for breath under him and Dean didn’t _care_. He propped his other arm next to Castiel’s head for leverage and continued the quickened pace, before his boner deflated.

From underneath, Cas continually raised his hips to meet every thrust, and _thank Jesus fucking Christ_ , Dean found himself right on the brink again. Cas was lucky he was so hot, and looked like a debauched Greek god underneath him - all flushed and sweaty and gorgeous. Dean concentrated on the feeling building in his body, chasing after his orgasm, and he could see the explosive light at the end of the tunnel.

Soon, Cas let out a muffled shout from behind Dean’s hand, and he could _feel_ Castiel's cock pulse inside him - that was the final push he needed to tumble over the ledge. He was rocking vigorously through the pleasure, spilling cum all over Cas’ chest, and finally removing his palm from Cas’ mouth to let the sweet sounds his lover was making fill his ears.

He had an internal debate with himself, before leaning down and kissing Cas again. Because he fucking _wanted_ to. The angel looked confused, but eagerly returned the afterglow-inspired kiss until Dean broke away and lifted himself off Castiel’s softening cock. Without a word, or another scolding (or invitation, for that matter), Dean walked to the bathroom and turned on the shower.

Cas laid on the bed, covered in drying cum, and tried to catch his breath. He was confused, all over again, and wondered if he should join Dean in the shower? Probably not.

He didn’t feel like being pelted with shampoo and conditioner bottles, after all.

\--------

It was a serene moment. Strangely domestic, and Dean wouldn’t have it any other way. They were lazing about, watching the news on TV looking for hunts rather than Googling strange events and Cas was stretched out on the couch with his head pillowed on Dean’s lap. Obviously, they knew they probably weren’t going to find anything on a national TV station, but it was nice to have a little down time. When Dean wasn’t running his fingers and disheveling Cas’ already wild locks, he was taking sips from his coffee which currently sat next to him on a small table.

They’d installed this TV only recently, because they’d been spending more time in the bunker and a certain archangel had _demanded_ it.

And by _install_ , they obviously meant said archangel had _mojo’d_ the fucking hugest, nicest state-of-the-art television currently on the market into the lounge area and surprised everyone.

Needless to say, the debut screening was a damn porno that had Cas and Dean immediately vacating the premises. As soon as the words ‘Casa Erotica’ flashed on the screen and Gabe appeared in a creepy mustache they were _done_. And that was also when Gabriel had tackled Sam to the couch.

More and more, Dean was beginning to accept Gabriel’s presence there. He seemed to calm Sam down, and rile him up at the same time, which was a rare feat. But the point was he was smiling way more, and if his brother was happy, he was happy.

Well, Cas made him happy, too.

Getting to fall asleep and wake up next to the angel was the best. Kissing him whenever he wanted - like _now_ , was great.

When Castiel opened his eyes after Dean drew away from the kiss, he looked similar to a pleased kitten. All glow-y and near-purring. It was adorable. He reached up and cupped Dean’s face as he rolled around onto his back to look straight up at him from his spot on his lap.

“It’s Sunday, Dean.” His thumb rubbed over the three-day stubble along the man’s cheek - it was rough but somehow ridiculously attractive.

“Yeah, Cas. What about it?” He covered Cas’ hand with his own and brought it to his mouth. When he kissed the man’s knuckles - one after the other - he tried to put as much love as he could into them. He wanted to show Cas how much he meant to him every single day.

“Take me to church.”

“Why do you wanna go to church?” His brows scrunched up in confusion.

“I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies. I'll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife. Offer me that deathless death - good God, let me give you my life. Take me to-”

Dean stood up abruptly, which sent Cas _tumbling_ to the floor.

But he didn’t stop there, and _crawled_ after him. “There is no sweeter innocence than our gentle sin. In the madness and soil of that sad earthly scene. Only then I am human. Only then I am clean. Amen.” After all, leaving a prayer unfinished was simply _unacceptable_ , but when he did finish... the human was gone.  
  
But he heard Sam’s voice echo through the bunker - “Hey, I _liked_ that one, Dean. At least it was kind of applicable.”

“Shut your fucking face.”

\----------

Even after the fall, and the ascent back to Heaven, there were still some angels who found rebellion appealing. It wasn’t a surprise - free will was a double-edged sword, because once people warmed to the idea, the world wasn’t black and white. It was suddenly a million different shades of grey and angel faction welcomed it with open arms.

Some didn’t agree with the new leadership, like those who would have given their left nut to see the apocalypse though. Those were the die-hards of the old rule - and _those_ were the ones who were still cavorting with _demons_. Those were the ones who needed to be taken down.

Gabriel was still in 'hiding,' which made their job more difficult than it _had_ to be, but everyone understood. It was a blessing that he even helped out at all. So, Hannah, Castiel, Sam and Dean were currently fighting with angel blades against a group of three demons and four angels. The odds weren’t the _worst_ , then after a few slit throats and dropped bodies, there was only one demon left but still three angels.

The angels were always tricky.

Which was why Hannah and Castiel were fighting them head to head.

Dean rounded on the last demon, as Sam turned his attention to help with the angel - but Dean’s blade was torn out of his hand by a pulse of demonic energy that had him _crashing_ into the nearest wall. He cursed loudly and thanked god he was in reach of his sawed off.

He scrambled from where he had been knocked over to the ground while Cas saw that he was in trouble to. Castiel reached out a flare of grace of his own, and gave the sawed-off _just enough_ push to land it in Dean’s hand.

Except, when Dean finally hauled it up and aimed at the demon, he heard Cas’ voice cut across the room to him and shout unabashed, “We're going down swinging. I'll be your number one with a bullet - a loaded god complex, cock it and pull it.”

That made the human’s blood _boil_ , and he threw himself into battle with a new tenacity.

He even fuckin’ screamed out a _battle cry_ from deep in his lungs, as he fired rock salt deep into the bastard demon’s chest, and when he was down, and charged for the blade. He threw himself to the ground, rolled while he grabbed the weapon, and his fluid momentum brought him right back up to the demon. Like a fucking ninja. Winding up and glaring with more malice at the black-eyed-fuck than even the _demon_ probably possessed, Dean slammed the blade into his sternum and twisted.

The next thing he did was a crime of _passion_ , as he looked back to where the angels were still fighting. Sam was looking worse for wear, but not seriously injured, yet. So he went to work.

A slashed palm and a sigil later, Dean looked back around to the group still in the heat of the fight.

“Castiel!” Dean’s voice was low and venomous, and _shit_ , everyone was nervous that he used his _fucking full name_. “Never. Quote. Fall. Out. Boy. In. Battle.”

Then Dean made a show of unveiling the angel banishing sigil, before slamming his bloody hand down on it.

After shouts and a bright-white flash... it was only Sam and himself left in the room.

The younger Winchester looked at Dean with wide-eyes and yelped, “Did you just _banished_ Hannah and Cas, too?!”

“Hannah was a causality.” His voice was monotone. “Hopefully she’ll bitch out Cas, and that’ll teach ‘m a lesson.”

“Don’t you think that’s a little _extreme_?”

“Trust me, Sammy… it’s _really_ not.”

\---------

“Dude! It’s even _worse_ now that we’re together! It’s like he’s trying to cock-block _himself_! And _me,_ by default. At least he’s not trying to use movies _as_ much. But he’s constantly using fucking pop song lyrics as every day romancing shit. Is he fucking with me? He’s _got_ to be fucking with me. I’m literally going crazy!” Dean raged as he paced back and forth in Sam’s room, which he had apologetically broken into. “He quoted Maroon 5. While we were having sex.”

He knew for a fact Gabriel was hopping around on some mission with Hannah (who was monumentally _pissed_ at Castiel) at that very moment (the two had become strangely good friends which was bizarre, since they were like night and day) and Dean had to vent to _someone_.

“Are you serious?“ As much as he pitied his brother, Sam couldn’t help but snicker. “I think this is just a case of Cas needing to break a habit. As much as you told him he didn’t need to use references to win you over, you have to admit... they _did_ get your attention and that whole incident is probably the reason you both got your heads out of your asses. You just need negative reinforcement or something.”

“I’ve been _drowning_ him in negative reinforcement! You’d think fucking _banishing him_ would have gotten it through his thick skull!” Dean raged before collapsing down on Sam’s bed. Then he mumbled, “It wasn’t the reference thing that got us together. It woulda happened anyway.”

“You know that’s a lie,” Sam gave him a bitch-face. “If explaining it to him doesn’t work, I’m not quite sure _what_ will… Cas can be really dense… so maybe it’ll have to be the repetition until the light bulb finally goes off.”

Dean grumbled to himself and crossed his arms while looking up at the ceiling.

Sam watched him think.

Neither of them moved for a very long time.

Until Dean shot up out of the bed, his eyes wide and the wheels turning. “All right. I think I’ve got it.”

The younger Winchester jerked in surprise at Dean’s sudden bolt upright, and looked uneasy. “Good luck?”

“Yeah,” Dean nodded his head so hard it looked like it was going to fall off. “Luck ain’t got nothing to do with it. Gonna crack that skull open with a sledgehammer.”

“I hope that’s not literal…”

“If it doesn’t work as a metaphor, it may just have to be…”

\----------

Castiel felt like he should apologize. There was a tension between them you could cut with a knife, and he didn’t like it. He didn’t like it one bit. After how _hard_ he had worked to earn the man’s affections, it turned out he was reversing all of his work, somehow. So he trudged through the bunker until he found Dean sitting on the couch with a beer, watching a movie.

He silently sat next to him and reached out to hold his hand, and Dean let him.

This was a good sign.

“Dean… I’m sorry for taking this too far. I’m still a bit unsure about social cues and didn’t realize you were becoming frustrated. Will you accept my apologies?” He squeezed the man’s hand, facing him and awaiting a reaction. “I promise to watch myself, it’s just become a… bad habit.”

“I wasn't looking for a promise or commitment, but it was never just fun and I thought you were different. This is not the way you realize that you want it, it's a bit too much too late if I'm honest.” The human’s words flew together casually, while he kept his eyes trained on the TV, “Don’t fuck with my love.”

Cas looked _terrified_ , Dean wasn’t looking him in the eye so he began to squeeze his hand, harder this time. “I’m not, you know how much I love you, Dean. Please, tell me what I can do, there has to be something. I want to make it up to you, I don't want this to get between us.”

With a shrug he said, “If you wanna keep me you gotta love me harder. And if you really need me you gotta love me harder.”

“Of course I need you,” Castiel was getting _desperate_ , he reached out and grabbed Dean’s face, jerking him around until they were finally locking eyes. “And I love you. How can you possibly think I don’t?”

“You and me, we made a vow for better or for worse. I can't believe you let me down, but the proof's in a way it hurts.” Dean, so far, was winning in the fact that he hadn’t let himself begin laughing, but Cas was starting to get really, _really_ upset.

“No… Dean, no-”

Guess he's just have to be obvious about it. “We've been walking down this road some time and you love, and you love me good, no lie. But there's something behind those eyes, those eyes. That you can't, that you can't disguise, disguise.”

“ _Oh_!” Cas’ eyes finally lit up in understanding. “You’re referencing pop songs!”

“Blame it on the night. Don’t blame it on me.”

“Dean, you can talk to me about it, there‘s something that we need to fix-”

“We don't have to worry 'bout nothing. 'Cause we got the fire, and we're burning one hell of a something.”

Castiel was getting more frustrated by the second, “You won’t be able to find the lyrics to properly handle this problem, Dean. Please, stop.”

“I love bad bitches, that’s my fuckin’ problem.”

“How do you even _know_ A$AP Rocky lyrics?!”

Dean couldn‘t help but start cracking up, “I’m too hot, hot damn. Call the police and the fireman. I’m too hot. Make a dragon wanna retire, man.”

It was _obvious_ how upset Cas was becoming, as he lunged into Dean’s personal space and _growled_ , “This isn’t funny Dean! Stop laughing!”

“Are you telling me my Billboard Hot 100 seduction technique isn’t working?!” Dean snarled, getting right up in Cas’ face.

“No!” He roared back.

“Well, now you know how I feel,” Dean’s voice returned back to a normal level and he flashed him a grin. “Not so fun is it?”

Cas huffed to catch his breath, now _thoroughly_ riled up and didn’t hesitate to crawl on Dean’s lap and kiss him stupid. Dean moaned into the angel’s mouth and reached down to grab handful’s of Castiel’s ass as he started grinding down on him.

“Fine,” Cas sucked Dean’s bottom lip into his mouth. “You’ve proven your point,” he licked into the man’s mouth. “I understand now.”

“Good,” Dean hummed happily and thrust his pelvis upward against Cas - then he started snickering all over again, “You got that James Dean daydream look in your eye.”

“ _Dean_ -” he sunk his teeth into Dean’s neck as warning, which earned him a hiss.

“Sorry, sorry. It’s kinda fun, I guess I could see why you do it. All right, all done now.”

“Good. Now _shut up_ , and kiss me.”


End file.
